the Cat's blog is sucking my brain out of my head.
1: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first? A box of sheet protectors on an industrial metal wall shelf. Or maybe a box of transparencies. I'm nearsighted, remember?
2: What is the last thing you watched on TV? Cubs 12, Pirates 1
3: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is. 4:45
4: Now look at the clock; what is the actual time? 4:54 - woohoo!
5: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? Server whirring. Mini-fridge cycling. Random office noise, but from far away.
6: When did you last step outside? what were you doing? 8:54; arriving at work.
7: Did you dream last night? Yes.
8: When did you last laugh? Really hard - last night, when I read that J.R.'s eating cat food 'cause she's lazy. Sorta hard, this morning while discussing sleekness issues online with a very helpful but still somehow frustrating person.
9: What is on the walls of the room you are in? Ye gods, a list? Fine, from the point of the transparencies box, then, clockwise:
a) note taped to wall that reads: "Dear Sirs, Please accept these books as a donation - they shouldn't just be thrown away." (posted next to donation shelf)
b) mug rack
c) bulletin board covered with postcards + 1 tracing of rabid squirrel
d) projected cast of the Stephanie Plum movie
e) Professor Frink in an apple ("Frink Different")
f) behind computer consultant's desk, 2 very old red Valentine hearts made of construction paper. 1 reads: "Cutie"; the other: "U R A OK". Erm, perhaps they should be removed?
g) one of two signs (one each for 2 doors) that reads: "Technical Services: Please Use Other Door", for use in emergencies (generally of a mental and/or musical nature).
h) coworker T's bulletin board, covered with Cubs memorabilia and photos of her children
i) calendars
j) my bulletin board, containing: 1 pair miniature pink furry underpants; sign reading "When someone annoys you, remember this: it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and whack them in the head."; 5 comic strips; 4 newspaper photos of athletes; 1 business card; 1 red ribbon ("2nd Place!"); 1 marker-colored cow; several hand-written quotations; and a postcard featuring four photographs of sumo wrestlers which was saved from destruction when the book it had been marking was withdrawn.
13: Seen anything weird lately? Other than my office? Yes, in the Amazon.com reader reviews for the new Bob Woodward book Plan of Attack, there's one by a reader "named" Dipper Lips. Here it is, in its entirety: "I Dipper sleepy. Book me tired. Flying monkeys give me itchies. Fly monkey fly."
14: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first? A time machine.
15: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? That's too much power for an impulsive person to have. Today, I'd probably eliminate suffering - but only for people I like.
16: Do you like to dance? Yes. That does not equate to "can you dance?"
17: George Bush Do I have to? I'd really rather not.
18: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? Sam. But I'm not going to have a child.
19: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? Nat. But I'm not going to have a child.
22: Would you ever consider living abroad? Yes. Since I'm such a poor traveler, though, I'd better choose well the first time - I wouldn't want to have to come back. I'd imagine I'll eventually have to choose a place that doesn't have an extradition treaty anyway.
