A to Z: The First Things in My Life
Apartment
It was a mint-green 3-bedroom house on Lafayette, in my hometown. I sublet it from R.A. and Ginny for 2 months @ $75/mo. It had an attached garage, although the landlord, for no apparent reason, had rented the garage to someone else...who was living in the garage. Whatever. I lived there during June and July of the summer between freshman and sophomore years of college. Drank a lot of beer with 2 guys with whom I went to high school named "Dewey" and "Pauly". Launched the memorable series of liaisons (is that the correct French plural of "liaison"?) with Two O'clock Man. Probably worked a lot and took some classes.
Best Friend
Jennifer. We were in kindergarten together. She was beautiful: tall and willowy and graceful. I was short & skinny & always just a little grubby. Now she has a gorgeous husband and a stunningly handsome child, and she's still amazingly pretty, even at our advanced age. And the really weird thing is that we're still friends.
Car
First car I drove: Helga. A little hatchback, silver and black body with burgundy cloth interior--and a better engine. That thing could fly.
First car I owned in my own name: 2002 Honda Civic LX, silver/gray cloth interior--manual transmission and an Alpine CD player. Yeah, it's my current car.
Date
First real date? As in, regulation "asking" and "showing up" and "going out"? Mr. Cutler. Mmm. Nice guy. I don't know if anyone will ever believe me when I say this, but it's absolutely true: I saw lightning and heard thunder when he kissed me for the first time. It was storming that night, so it's not completely impossible. And it was that electric.
Wonder where he is now...?
Enemy
Sheesh, there are so many! Probably Tina, or maybe Cindy, who was my friend and then my enemy on and off for years. I'd still gladly trip her into a mud puddle. ;)
Funeral
The first one that I remember well was my paternal grandmother's. I was about 7, I think? She'd been ill for quite a while and I remember that the funeral home didn't smell as bad (i.e. offensive) as the hospital had. Little kids' memories are so weird that way.
Gamble
I'm going to take this less literally than some people might.
I broke up with Paul to go out with Little Brian...um, I can't recall his last name now. Anyway, Paul was a "given" and Brian was the unknown quantity. It was socially dangerous, but I was happier. Paul was too rich for my blood.
Heartbreak
Oh, that's totally easy: Russ.
Intoxication
I'm tempted to say, "Russ." But instead I'll cop to the usual and admit to creme de menthe with Jennifer when we were in 4th grade. Bed-spins and everything. Eeew. I didn't drink again until I was 16.
Job
Title: Lackey
Sub-Location: Bakery
Location: IGA
Starting Wage: $3.85/hr.
Starting Age: 16
Ending Wage: $6.30/hr.
Ending Age: 19
Duties included: customer service, cleaning, frying doughnuts, baking (bread, cookies, etc.), decorating cakes
Kiss
Earl (his middle name just popped into my head--how weird is that?!). I was 14 and he was 13. After his orchestra concert, in October of...1984. On the sidewalk between the public library and the East building of the middle school.
Love
What is love, anyway?
Movie
I have no clue. Probably something horrible and dated. I remember going to Masquerade with Blake. And The Hand that Rocks the Cradle (?) with John. Those were memorable, so that should satisfy some curiosity.
Nickname
A-Mouse. It's a play on my name (Aim-Mouse), and the fact that I was ridiculously skinny as a young child.
Overnight Sleepover
Disregarding innumerable cousin things, I'll say it was with Jennifer, too. Long before the creme de menthe incident of 1979.
Pet
[redacted], the adorable mutt.
Queer Experience
Nert--never.
Road Trip
Sigh. It was very recent, and it was with Nick, and it was lovely.
Speeding Ticket
Never had one. I should get them all the time, but I've been unaccountably lucky.
Time
Depeche Mode (with Nitzer Ebb) at Summerfest with my roommate, Christine. It was amazing, like aural sex.
Visit to Another Country
[Wince] I've never been out of the country.
I lived 40 miles from Canada for 4 years and never went.
There's a much better chance, though, that I'll leave the country now than than that I would leave the city then.
Westward Migration
Er, I'm not sure how to answer this. So I'll take it 2 ways.
First, literally. The only time that I migrated west was when I moved from the Mitten to the Flatland. It was a good move, in that I regained some much-needed sanity. And I was doing something for myself after spending 4 years toiling in obscurity for someone else's gain.
But for as good as the move was, it was also hell. I started law school 2 days after moving here, and 3 days before my belongings arrived on the moving van. I wasn't emotionally prepared for law school, and no matter how intellectually prepared one can be, it's an emotional exercise more than anything.
I survived, though, and lived to tell.
Second: westward migration in a more figurative sense--vacation. That would be four days in Houston, in April '99. Perfect weather for a midwesterner. Fantastic hotel. I walked all over, which made me a freak of nature to the Texans. Decent food. The terror of pigeons. $1.50 10-oz. bottles of Coke. But, in all, 'twas fun--which I needed.
X-Ray
Undoubtedly a head x-ray. I've had zillions. Orthodontia, y'know.
Yoni Tree
Huh? Ah. Merriam-Webster Online says "a stylized representation of the female genitalia symbolizing the feminine principle in Hindu cosmology." Ohhh Kaaay. Prehaps I'm revealing my endless lack of sophistication again, but I'm not worrying about it.
Zombie Movie
Never seen one. Ever! I'm a total freak of nature, but movies really freak me out--I'm too suggestible.
[via Sweet Memes, who found it at Life is Woo Woo. Thanks, y'all!]
It was a mint-green 3-bedroom house on Lafayette, in my hometown. I sublet it from R.A. and Ginny for 2 months @ $75/mo. It had an attached garage, although the landlord, for no apparent reason, had rented the garage to someone else...who was living in the garage. Whatever. I lived there during June and July of the summer between freshman and sophomore years of college. Drank a lot of beer with 2 guys with whom I went to high school named "Dewey" and "Pauly". Launched the memorable series of liaisons (is that the correct French plural of "liaison"?) with Two O'clock Man. Probably worked a lot and took some classes.
Best Friend
Jennifer. We were in kindergarten together. She was beautiful: tall and willowy and graceful. I was short & skinny & always just a little grubby. Now she has a gorgeous husband and a stunningly handsome child, and she's still amazingly pretty, even at our advanced age. And the really weird thing is that we're still friends.
Car
First car I drove: Helga. A little hatchback, silver and black body with burgundy cloth interior--and a better engine. That thing could fly.
First car I owned in my own name: 2002 Honda Civic LX, silver/gray cloth interior--manual transmission and an Alpine CD player. Yeah, it's my current car.
Date
First real date? As in, regulation "asking" and "showing up" and "going out"? Mr. Cutler. Mmm. Nice guy. I don't know if anyone will ever believe me when I say this, but it's absolutely true: I saw lightning and heard thunder when he kissed me for the first time. It was storming that night, so it's not completely impossible. And it was that electric.
Wonder where he is now...?
Enemy
Sheesh, there are so many! Probably Tina, or maybe Cindy, who was my friend and then my enemy on and off for years. I'd still gladly trip her into a mud puddle. ;)
Funeral
The first one that I remember well was my paternal grandmother's. I was about 7, I think? She'd been ill for quite a while and I remember that the funeral home didn't smell as bad (i.e. offensive) as the hospital had. Little kids' memories are so weird that way.
Gamble
I'm going to take this less literally than some people might.
I broke up with Paul to go out with Little Brian...um, I can't recall his last name now. Anyway, Paul was a "given" and Brian was the unknown quantity. It was socially dangerous, but I was happier. Paul was too rich for my blood.
Heartbreak
Oh, that's totally easy: Russ.
Intoxication
I'm tempted to say, "Russ." But instead I'll cop to the usual and admit to creme de menthe with Jennifer when we were in 4th grade. Bed-spins and everything. Eeew. I didn't drink again until I was 16.
Job
Title: Lackey
Sub-Location: Bakery
Location: IGA
Starting Wage: $3.85/hr.
Starting Age: 16
Ending Wage: $6.30/hr.
Ending Age: 19
Duties included: customer service, cleaning, frying doughnuts, baking (bread, cookies, etc.), decorating cakes
Kiss
Earl (his middle name just popped into my head--how weird is that?!). I was 14 and he was 13. After his orchestra concert, in October of...1984. On the sidewalk between the public library and the East building of the middle school.
Love
What is love, anyway?
Movie
I have no clue. Probably something horrible and dated. I remember going to Masquerade with Blake. And The Hand that Rocks the Cradle (?) with John. Those were memorable, so that should satisfy some curiosity.
Nickname
A-Mouse. It's a play on my name (Aim-Mouse), and the fact that I was ridiculously skinny as a young child.
Overnight Sleepover
Disregarding innumerable cousin things, I'll say it was with Jennifer, too. Long before the creme de menthe incident of 1979.
Pet
[redacted], the adorable mutt.
Queer Experience
Nert--never.
Road Trip
Sigh. It was very recent, and it was with Nick, and it was lovely.
Speeding Ticket
Never had one. I should get them all the time, but I've been unaccountably lucky.
Time
- May 6
- BPN
- his best friend's brother's apartment
- forgettable but for the "getting it over with" part
Depeche Mode (with Nitzer Ebb) at Summerfest with my roommate, Christine. It was amazing, like aural sex.
Visit to Another Country
[Wince] I've never been out of the country.
I lived 40 miles from Canada for 4 years and never went.
There's a much better chance, though, that I'll leave the country now than than that I would leave the city then.
Westward Migration
Er, I'm not sure how to answer this. So I'll take it 2 ways.
First, literally. The only time that I migrated west was when I moved from the Mitten to the Flatland. It was a good move, in that I regained some much-needed sanity. And I was doing something for myself after spending 4 years toiling in obscurity for someone else's gain.
But for as good as the move was, it was also hell. I started law school 2 days after moving here, and 3 days before my belongings arrived on the moving van. I wasn't emotionally prepared for law school, and no matter how intellectually prepared one can be, it's an emotional exercise more than anything.
I survived, though, and lived to tell.
Second: westward migration in a more figurative sense--vacation. That would be four days in Houston, in April '99. Perfect weather for a midwesterner. Fantastic hotel. I walked all over, which made me a freak of nature to the Texans. Decent food. The terror of pigeons. $1.50 10-oz. bottles of Coke. But, in all, 'twas fun--which I needed.
X-Ray
Undoubtedly a head x-ray. I've had zillions. Orthodontia, y'know.
Yoni Tree
Huh? Ah. Merriam-Webster Online says "a stylized representation of the female genitalia symbolizing the feminine principle in Hindu cosmology." Ohhh Kaaay. Prehaps I'm revealing my endless lack of sophistication again, but I'm not worrying about it.
Zombie Movie
Never seen one. Ever! I'm a total freak of nature, but movies really freak me out--I'm too suggestible.
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