more of the same

    I seem to have lost part of myself. An important part. Maybe the map to my soul? And no matter where I look, I cannot seem to find it again, or even a clue as to where to start seeking it again, or how to get a new one. Today I looked at S.H. Mall and in G-town; what I got for my effort was some truly black nail polish (see below), a book of Indian poetry, some unappreciated leering from a furry-faced undergraduate with throat-clearing issues and an unfortunate fondness for flip-flops (just not a good look for men ever, in my opinion), and a silly, freckly sunburn on my left arm.
    And this song, drilled into my head. Eerie, irritating, and apt.

It is so easy to see dysfunction between you and me
We must free up these tired souls before the sadness kills us both
I tried and tried to let you know I love you but I'm letting go
It may not last, but, I know I just don't know
If you don't know then you can't care
And you show up but you're not there
But I'm waiting and you want to--
Still afraid that I will desert you

Everyday, with every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
Nothing lasts forever, but be honest, babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

A bed that's warm with memories can heal us temporarily
The misbehaving only makes the ditch between us so damn deep
Built a wall around my heart I'll never let it fall apart
But strangely I wish secretly it would fall down while I'm asleep...

Though we have not hit the ground it doesn't mean we're not still falling
Oh, I want so bad to pick you up but you're still too reluctant to accept my help
What a shame, I hope you find somewhere to place the blame
But until then the fact remains...

Everyday, with every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way
["Nothing Lasts Forever," Maroon 5, from It Won't Be Soon Before Long]