- I'm working my way through the many, many, many bath & body products that I've received as gifts over the past year or so. The majority either came from K himself (his imagination for presents was not vast, so once he found something that did the trick, he stuck with it) or from his family. It might not seem like an overwhelming thing, but there are times when it absolutely wears on me. The 'white tea' variety is light--almost imperceptible--and perfect for wear under another fragrance. It literally reminds me of the understated grace of the person from whom I received it, his aunt D. I never had the chance to spend much time with her, though she is the relative of his that he always said I was the most like.
Another of the tough ones is what is in the air right now: a shampoo/conditioner set that he gave to me for Christmas this last year, a heavy scent of jasmine and probably lavender...? No, I just checked and it claims to be jasmine and vanilla, but the vanilla is lost beneath the subsidiary ingredients of sandalwood and patchouli. It is really quite strong and lasts seemingly forever, more reminiscent of candle or even incense than a "hair smell." But that doesn't matter--it came from him, it reminds me of him, and with all this hair, the scent hovers around my head and I'm in a sort of fog of reminiscence when I use it (rarely).I'm open, you're closed There's probably something wrong with me; I cannot just throw it away, or give it away. It was a gift, to me. And I'm not catatonic with grief over it, just nostalgic. Sad. But I guess it's like that line from Cocktail: "Everything ends badly. Otherwise it wouldn't end."
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face - Ah. OK. So. Moving on.
I don't know if anything makes me laugh harder than random references to Chuck Norris. I love that Mountain Dew commercial, the one with the two guys and their "Chuckstrich" website...? Where they've gotten like a million hits, and they're celebrating (with a Dew, of course), and then Chuck Norris comes to the door. And then he chases them all over hell, and the final shot is "Paybacks are Hell", with a new website of Chuck Norris sitting at the computer watching computerized Chuck Norris kicking each of them in the head, in turn. I laugh out loud every single time I see it. Hilarious.
This morning, I was flipping through the print advertising for the local Kohl's store. They have a zillion printed t-shirts, which I generally think are so incredibly stupid that I won't even look at them (it's part of my upbringing--don't make eye contact because it only encourages them!) but for some reason I was drawn to a deep green one. It seemed to have Smokey the Bear on it, but upon further scrutiny I realized it was in fact Chuck Norris, and what it said was priceless: Only Chuck Norris Can Prevent Forest Fires
Oh my God, I was laughing my ass off. I wish I could come up with this stuff on my own. - Speaking of Kohl's, I was looking at their shoes. What the fuck?! Could they be any more ugly, non-functional, putrid, or just utterly horrible?! I know I'm not the target audience for fashion anymore (thank God!), but this shit really...ugh. I pity the poor idiots who think this crap looks good, because in 5 years they will be looking at photographs of themselves and thinking, "What the fuck?!" The shoes are the worst, but the clothes are pretty bad, too. Rinsed blue denim "cropped pants" that are really knee-length tight shorts? What body-type would THAT flatter? Pencil skirts with 7" slits up the front? Sigh. I. Am. Old.
- Not sure if the online dating experience is making me feel older or younger, but it is definitely...an experience. This week has been one of some bigger lessons, too. For instance:
- Really Nice Guys who have never been married will freak and run when they find out that I have been married, so it's best to just get it over with earlier rather than waiting until later, and tell them pretty much right off the bat.
- Any 'date-like' plan that involves a warehouse and/or the South Side needs to be reality-checked through The Cat (and potentially The Beast!) before it is accepted.
- Black and white profile photos are almost inevitably more intriguing than color pictures. Anything with children or pets makes me cringe, but wild or zoo animals are a plus. (Keep your minds out of the gutter, please!) Close-ups of body parts are almost NEVER good, particularly eyeballs (ick!) and tattoos. And using truly terrible or obscure pictures ("I'm the guy in the background, to the left of the Coke machine") is just idiotic; what's the point?
I had not anticipated that I would become such a critic of this particular element. - No matter how it pops up, the [original] L word comes as a huge surprise when I've never met someone in person!
- Being polite to someone I don't know and don't have any interest in whatsoever is not only unnecessary but will cause no end of hassle later. It's better to be brutal than terminally annoyed.
- The "woo" on OkCupid is a very, very bad thing. At best, it is a cop-out. However, setting one's profile at "un-woo-able" is seen as elitist and unapproachable, and may cut out one great connection despite allowing 5 dozen mediocre ones. Who knew there would be such 'rules'?
- Though my profile clearly indicates that I have a graduate degree, that information is obviously overlooked in favor of some other data which is more appealing or pertinent (my height?! my toe ring?!?!?!?), so if I actually intend on having anything to do with someone in reality, I'd better be upfront about my education right away so that doesn't come as a surprise later, either. When a guy's expecting a dumb blond and they get me--even as flaky as I can be {consider the warehouse plan!}--they will be either intimidated or disappointed. Why bother?
- Any guys with a web-cam = scary as hell. There is absolutely no reason that I could ever want to see whatever would be transmitted through such a thing. Ever, ever, ever. {{{shudder}}}
- No matter how you find them, what passes between, or any other circumstances, boys will ALWAYS be boys.
- Only three days of work this week, and then I stuff the car full of miscellaneous whatever and head north. I'm going on vacation! The plan is to pack on Wednesday night and leave as early as I can hit the road on Thursday, which for me is probably around 10:AM. Which would get me there around 2, probably, if I wasn't planning to stop at the Dells again. It's silly, but, I really liked the outlet mall there and I want to go back... for another... blue... shirt... and a white shirt just like it. Hee hee hee!
Anyway, I'll be in the home state for nearly a week, during which I will have the chance to see my niece (yay!) and her boyfriend, whom I've only met once before, and their new baby (woohoo!!!). Prepare yourself; this blog will almost certainly be deluged with photographs of a Winston Churchill look-alike, and much cooing. Yeah, I will also see my parents and brother and the rest of the crew, blah blah blah.
Somewhere in there, I will have a birthday.
I need to come back the following Wednesday for an appointment, but I don't have to be back at work until, um, the next Tuesday, I think. hee hee. I should probably check before I leave, to make sure. But, whatever! I'm getting out! - The Cubs and Cardinals were on national TV yesterday. The game was scheduled to start at 2:55, but there was a 61 minute rain delay. I had the TV on the whole time, waiting (even though I had to listen to the Yankees-Tigers game, which sucks because I loathe Roger Clemens and everything for which he stands). And I watched every moment of the Cubs-Cards game, even through the next 61 minute rain delay (how's that for a bizarre, and slightly irritating, coincidence?), during which Jeanne Zelasko, Kevin Kennedy, and Eric Karros (thub-thump!) entertained/annoyed/stumbled their way through the experience of s-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n-g what little actual information they had to share, as long as they could, in a manner than was eventually just funny because it was so obviously strained and uncomfortable and surreal and tense and manic. I nearly fell off the couch when Daryle Ward (who may have the most infectious smile in all of baseball) hit the grand slam in the third inning. I danced around the living room when Ryan Dempster walked zero in the 9th (unheard of in recorded f---ing history!!!), and the Cubs won 5-3.
I love this game. - ...although I am very much looking forward to some UM football this year. Last year it was so disappointing, after they went 11-0 to start the season, that they couldn't pull off the big win against Ohio State and then they were crushed (not surprisingly) in the Rose Bowl. This year, though: they'll do it. Henne, Long & especially Hart shall lead them. My most recent alma mater, on the other hand, is ranked 116 of the 119 Division I teams, and is expected to go 1-11 on the year (0-8 in the MAC). Go Birds!
I know; I'm a freak of nature. I've also got a migraine the size of Rhode Island, so, leave me alone. - It's raining and cool. The perfect day to be curled up in a ball with someone else. However, I have not spoken to another human in...44 hours and 15 minutes, give or take. In all likelihood, it will stretch to roughly 63.5 hours between actual, verbal conversations. Eh, no big deal. Did I ever mention that I'm an introvert?
- I watched parts of the movie Win a Date with Tad Hamilton! last night. It was on after the Cubs-Cards game, I wasn't doing anything else, and I had a vague interest in seeing what the fuss was (i.e. had been) about. It wouldn't take a rocket scientist to figure this one out, but it was sort of smile-inducing in parts and relatively painless overall.
The part that really bit was toward the end, where Topher Grace's character is in the bar, talking with the bartender, played by Kathryn Hahn. She says:Well, is it love, big love, or great love? I understand that. Even if you're not in it, even if you intentionally choose to not want to be anywhere close to it, it's in you. Like a sliver of glass that you cannot find, no matter how many times or how deeply you dig for it with needles or tweezers. All you're doing is stabbing yourself again and again, making the pain more intense and longer-lasting, and it's never gonna go away. It's Great Love, right? It's just there. At some point you just have to say, I am stuck with this. This is me, the way I am, from this moment onward. So, moving on....
What do you mean?
Well, love you get over in two months, big love you get over in two years, and great love, well...great love...changes your life. So which one is it?
[He laughs and takes a big gulp out of his drink.]
Oh my god, it's great love.
Yeah, that's just great. - The state representative is coming to work this week, apparently at my request (?). We are going to talk about the grant that I wrote last year, which funded $3000 toward our large print nonfiction collection. He's a good guy, though not of my particular ideological leaning. At least he supports the workplace, theoretically and financially. I'm dreading the whole Meet & Greet scenario, though; it's such a drain. Not to mention needing to dress like a grownup, tidying the office tomorrow in preparation (yeah, I'll need to take the "Vegetarians Taste Better" bumper sticker down from the wall, damn it), wasting an hour while he's there and then an hour afterward to CSI every second of it with the rest of the staff. Blegh. I suppose it's worth it in the end, if we keep getting funded; $11,000 for materials over 4 years isn't too bad. In fact, that's something that we should make a bigger deal about.
Happy rainy Sunday, y'all.
UPDATE: As if it wasn't bad enough before. Immediately after posting this, I popped over to Yahoo to check my email, only to find a report that 4 people have died in flooding in and around my hometown. (According to the local news, the death toll stands at five.) Hasn't the state gone through enough?
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