nothing keeps

• Is there a night you would like to put on repeat, and live it forever?  No, thank you. Sometimes part of what is good about it is knowing that it is fleeting.
  What can we take on trust
  in this uncertain life? Happiness, greatness,
  pride - nothing is secure, nothing keeps.
  [Euripides, Hecuba]
• Have you kissed more than 1 person this year?  Not exactly.
• Can you recall the last time you liked someone a lot?  I do.
• Are you cheating on someone right now?  I'm not.
• Anyone of the opposite sex been on your mind lately?  Yes.
• Someone knocks on your window at 2 am, what do you say?  "[#$%&;$%&;;*%^#]! Cat, you've truly learned to fly!"
• Will you be in a relationship next month?  God knows--I'm a surgeon, not a psychiatrist!
• Ever had a sleep over with the opposite sex?  Um, yeah. {eye-roll}
• Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?  College BFF. La la la la, happy birthday! Two of my best friends' birthdays yesterday, in fact--Heidi's, too.
• Anyone you're giving up on?
  The last week+ shows that gut feelings about female friends are usually right. Some people are destined to be good, close friends, regardless of the shit we can sometimes put each other through. Others, despite efforts to the contrary, will prove themselves over and over to be nothing beyond sparkly acquaintances. Best if I not confuse the two.
• Have you ever fallen asleep with the last person you kissed? No.
• What were you doing at 10:30 last night? Reading, probably?
• What mood are you in right now? Variable. 98% fine, except my left shoulder feels like searing agony and my mouse suddenly doesn't work.
• Will your next kiss be a mistake? I'm out of the game. Fuck it.
• When is the next time you'll hug someone? Thursday, if not sooner.
• Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days? I think I was hugged once or twice in the past week, in thanks for a birthday gift and a random Hello from someone I hadn't seen for too long.
• Is the last person you kissed mad at you? No.
• Does it bother you when someone lies to you? Naturally.
• Do you still talk to the person you were dating 5 months ago? No, but the person who comes closest to that will read this....
• Do you like animals? Yup, especially slow-roasted with BBQ sauce.
• Are you easily bothered? Apparently so, judging by my colleagues' reactions to my results in the "True Colors" quiz at yesterday's training day. Fuckers....
• How long have you been on the computer? Today? Maybe 45 minutes.
• Are you nice to everyone? Ha! Not even close. If I'm nice to you, consider it the huge honor that it's intended to be. [Yes, I'm kidding.] [Well, even so, I'm still not nice to everyone.]
• Have you ever slept in the same bed as your friend? How old are you, 8? I've slept in lots of same beds as lots of friends, in all sorts of permutations.
• Who will you be sleeping with tonight? Depends on which way the coin flips, I guess.
• Do you watch The Hills? Never. Am I missing anything?
• Wearing any bracelets? Nope. I own...maybe 8 chain/beaded bracelets and a couple of bangles (including a solid silver/turquoise cuff from Mexico), which I very, very rarely wear.
• Do you feel awkward when strangers say hi to you? Depends on the stranger and the circumstances. Midday, in my hometown? Not at all. 3:AM at an otherwise deserted gas station in the middle of nowhere while I'm filling my dead-dry tank? "Awkward" doesn't cover it. At work? Sometimes, depending on the strangeness of the stranger.
• Are you any different now than you were a year ago? Yup.
• Are you taller than your mom? Yes. Probably four inches, maybe a little more.
• Is anything upsetting you right now? Shoulder. Mouse. Residual twitchy pointless anger from meeting yesterday.
• What's the farthest away from home you have ever been? It's psychological, not physical. April 2004.
• Do you hate being alone? Not at all. Not. At. All.
• Who was the last person you cried in front of? I cried on the phone with college BFF yesterday. Not big tears, but lump-in-throat. 'Big tears' was probably Fluffy. It usually is.
• What's on your agenda for tomorrow? "Agenda"? Me? Especially for a Sunday--ha! I might go to Moxie. That's the extent of my "plan."
• What are you doing today? You're looking at it. Oh, and someone's supposed to come over to talk strategy and probably have a cool adult beverage or two.
• If you could have one person with you right now, who would it be? I'm not suitable company at the moment, but I wouldn't probably refuse. Probably.
• Does anyone know your passwords other than you? Everybody knows my passwords--they just don't know that they are my passwords.
• Did you have a good day yesterday? Parts of it were fine. Discrete moments were execrable.
• Where would you like to be right now? Hotel Albatros, sitting in my second-floor room, sipping...whatever one drinks down there, contentedly ignoring my travel companion in her fourth-floor (opposite-end) room, contentedly ignoring me. Oh yeah, I think Tierra del Fuego could be big enough for the both of us.
• Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette? Yes, but. Now and then when I'm in the car with the windows down and someone fires one up from a car ahead, and that distinct sulfur/tobacco scent drifts back to me, I almost, almost miss it.
• Did any particular thing brighten up your day today? Not yet, but the day is young.
• Next piercing? Next Friday, here--at the place where I get my tattoos.
• How has the past week been for you? I think we've already covered this. There's been good (friends, letters, music), bad (headache, crazy work busy), and ugly (parts of that meeting).
• Do you currently have a hickey? Not hardly.
• Pick a word that starts with the second letter of your first name: Meh.
• One thing you're looking forward to? Seeing college BFF next week.
• Could you go out in public looking like you do now? Of course.
• Do you hate the last person you kissed? No, but neither am I thrilled with the situation.
• When was the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face? That would be yesterday, around 4:PM. She would be a little surprised, but rarely has anyone deserved it more.
• Would you rather be a hobbit, elf, dwarf, vampire, werewolf, mermaid, magician or unicorn? Riiiiiiight.
• What's your favorite pattern/print? Giraffe.
• If you could write a letter to your younger self, what would the introduction look like? This blog, and my numerous bound journals, are that letter. No intro necessary.
• If you have a best friend, tell us a little about them:
  
  • college BFF~Knows all the dirtiest dirt, but keeps it to herself. And has the best giggle ever.
  • Fluffy~Has heard the words, "This is probably too much information, but..." more often than anyone ever should, but still stays to listen to the rest. Thank God.
  • The Cat~Shares the micro-level hilarity, annoyance & heartbreak--and has me over for Thanksgiving anyway.
  • Heidi~Communicates on a different wavelength than anyone else, and can somehow manage to be soothing and exhilarating at once.
• Think back on a time when you were really really happy. Can you describe your exact feelings? Probably not. Happy, for me, is a sort of weightlessness, and to apply words, even descriptors, hangs something off the side that depletes its original buoyancy.
• What is your favorite musical instrument? To hear? Classically, oboe or French horn. In rock/pop, I'm drawn to subtle bass solos or songs with an overt bass line. And tangentially, when it was an issue, I always fell for the drummers.
• Who is your favorite fictional character? Everett Chance.
• Why do people watch so much TV? Because reading is hard.
• Why are there so many unsuccessful book-to-movie translations? Filmmaking has become too easy; there are simply too many movies being made. The likelihood of a good one is that much lower now than it used to be, particularly when preconceived expectations are so high. Anyway, when something objective (the look of the characters, the score, the cadence of the film) is overlaid on something so totally subjective (the image that one creates of the characters in a book, the music that would accompany it, the pacing, and so on), it cannot possibly match each viewer's expectations. It will fail to match--to meet--most of them.
• Are you afraid of the dark? No. Nothing exists in the dark that wasn't there in the light.
• If you could, would you become immortal? Not hardly.
• What do you like most about yourself? Given my last answer, I should say "realism." But...my aesthetic. Connections between what has to be and what might be.
• How about something you'd like to change about yourself? My chin and my finances.
• What does it take for you to be happy? I'll take suggestions from the audience on this one. I've no clue.
• If it was a choice between saving a thousand people you don't know or saving your three best friends, what would you do? Yes, my best friends mean more to me, on a utilitarian scale and any other, than do a thousand (or ten or a hundred... thousand) strangers. Such is the nature of personal connections. I'm not sorry.
• What do you hate more than anything? Cooked carrots.
• What would you rather never have to do: sleep, eat, or breathe? Sleep. I have the feeling it's responsible for the stabbing, shooting, horrifying pain in my shoulder/neck today.
• What is a talent you'd dearly like to have? I wish my skill for recalling song lyrics was matched by an ability to sing.
• Compare the love you have (or would like to have) to a famous romance: Read the poetry. That says it all.
• What do you think will happen to you when you die? I'll know when I get there. I'm not too concerned about it, really.
• Do you hate it when you think that someone's calling for your boyfriend/girlfriend across the way when it's really somebody else? N/A
• What was the farthest place you had to travel by foot recently? I wore pinchy shoes one day last week, so every step was a mile.
• Who were the last three people of the opposite sex you hugged? David, Rachel, and the Cat
• Have you ever looked for something that was in your hand? Probably--but I'm quite prone to searching for pens that are already behind my ear or slid into my hair.
• Do you remember the last thing you "aww'd" at? [video link died] It's extremely adorable.
• Why are you feeling the way that you are feeling right now? Shoulder: combination of dodgy posture and overdevelopment of first rib muscle; mouse: excessively delicate design meets indelicate use; meeting: um... I'm just not a meeting person.
• When was the last time you prank called somebody? c.1994
• Have you gotten gum stuck in your hair before? I was a small female. Seems likely, doesn't it?
• Did you have anything to eat for lunch today? Raisin bagel.
• What was the last movie you watched with talking animals? No clue. I'd imagine HJN was involved.
• Can you handle a relationship without amazing sex? Ha! HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
  No, seriously--what's harder is this: handling the nonexistence of a relationship that would involve amazing sex, were it allowed to exist.
• Have you run into a pole before? Only on foot.
• On this same month one year ago, were you single? clearly.
• Is there anyone that you like at the moment? oh yeah
• Was the last animal you touched/pet a household pet? I'm sure it was, though I can't recall the circumstances. Prehaps Ruka?
• What holiday do you always dread the most every year? Much like my coworkers, I dread each in its own special way.
• Who was the last person to put their arm around your shoulder? Probably Rachel?
• Have you ever cried from missing somebody so badly? yes
• What "minor problem" do you have that's been bothering you for a while? I think my gas light--my car has an indicator that lights when the gas tank is below a certain level--turned on yesterday. Or maybe the day before.
• Ever walked into the opposite sex's restroom by accident? No, but I do think that trendy restaurants and darkly-lit bars could be a little kinder to their customers when creating signage. It's never cool to feel like an idiot at a time like that.
• Do you have a "thing" for a celebrity? Prehaps, but I try to keep it professional.
• When was the last time someone said you "looked cute with someone" while near someone? Probably 5+ years ago. I strongly resist "cute" in all its forms.
• Have you kissed anybody today? Enough with the motherfucking kissing questions. The last time I tried to kiss someone, I failed. That hasn't happened since I was first learning how to kiss, first treading the waters of relationships. Just thinking about it--which I naturally avoid--makes me burn with embarrassment and...
  
  *sigh*
  So, NO. I haven't kissed anyone today.
• Is your best friend still a virgin? 3 of them have natural children, and the other...no, not the other, either.
• Where did you last order Chinese food/take-out? Great Hunan or The Garden. Since that's standard post-body modification fare, I might have it again next Friday. Woot!
• What was your dream last night? I was in a dark, smoky jazz club, sitting at a large round table. I was next to the Mumbler, but our chairs were almost back to back. He was with his GF and a few friends, and I was also with friends (including the delivery guy). Now and then, Mumbler and I would lean our chairs back toward each other to compare notes or just have a private conversation. It was entirely odd and would never in a million years happen in real life, but for a dream it was fantastic.
• During this time right now but 24 hours ago, what were you doing? Probably reading?
• Can you recite the alphabet backwards perfectly? No. Why would I?
• Ever liked someone even while you were taken all the while? Welcome to high school. In other words: yes.
• Who is the last person you high-fived? Ironically, one of the people from that meeting.
• What do you feel about "PDA"? Depends on your definitions of "public" and "affection." I know I lean toward the Clintonian at times like this, but I'm really not all that bothered (attitude toward mall-trolling teenagers notwithstanding) by this sort of thing. If it's not intended to be outrageous or distasteful--if it's not aimed outward--then I don't mind it at all. Ever.
• Have you ever tried to push open a door that said pull? Happens pretty much every time I go to a mall with The Cat--fairly often more than once at the same door. We each fall into that "book smart/brain dead" category now and then, especially when we're distracted.
• Be honest, who do you miss at this very moment and would love to see? If I'm Thirteen, then that makes you...?

[from The Cat, who got it here]