life will not break your heart. It'll crush it

1. How would you rate your sex drive? exactly as it ought to be
2. You are sitting alone with a stack of videos and a VCR. Of the following which are you most likely to put on? (1 is most likely, 10 is least):
   The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, Dracula, SLC Punk!, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me, Jerry Springer: Too Hot for TV, Singing in the Rain, Flash Gordon, The Matrix, Blade Runner, The Muppet Movie 1. Singing in the Rain; 2. The Muppet Movie; 3. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly; 4. Blade Runner; 5. Dracula. The rest of it is probably unwatchable.
3. Are you more likely to get or send random instant messages? get
4. If you were writing an ad telling people to come to your town, what would you say about it? "it's surprisingly culturally rich"
5. What part of your body can you not stand to get an itch on? bottom of my feet
6. How many people do you suppose have stolen that System of a Down album called 'steal this album'? lots
7. Name a band you like: Elbow
8. What are/were this band's roots and influences? Genesis, Talk Talk and Radiohead
9. Would you rather have a poster of John Lennon or a cute fuzzy black cat? why not both?
10. Make a public service announcement: no, thanks
11. What makes you feel the need to escape? the sense of being consigned to uselessness at work
12. You and your significant other, crush, interest etc. ... Who is the Ernie and who is the Bert? in "real life" I'm the Bert, but in the relationship I'm the Ernie--big time
13. When was the last time you did something and later asked yourself 'did I do the right thing'? Thursday evening
14. What do you find it hard to say goodbye to? a particular illusion. It waxes and wanes, and taunts me with hope and sorrow.
15. What is your fantasy Valentine's Day like? a fast drive on a warm, quiet desert night, ending with a stay someplace I've never been, but always wanted to visit 
16. If you had to have a color for a name, what color would it be? gray
17. Should preference be given to minority students during the college admission process? it depends on the school, and whether it has a history of discrimination on the basis of minority status
18. Sweet wine, fresh crisp apples, bagels with creme cheese and lox...what is the most incredibly luxurious food? roast beast and gravy
19. Is there really anything to fear in Communism? fear is not the word that I would use
20. Best Sesame Street character: Kermit
21. Most annoying Sesame Street character: Elmo
22. Feast or famine? what is the question?
23. Write a poem right here in five minutes or less: no, thank you
24. Do you stay and help clean up after a party? depends whose party it is
25. Why was the teddy bear named after Teddy Roosevelt? look it up
26. What are you the prince or princess of? all that I survey
27. Some people think that Christmas should be taken off of public school calendars because it is politically incorrect. What would you say to this? "some people say" questions are only so much rabble-rousing. Christmas is a holiday, and pretending that it doesn't exist is pointless. That being said, it is inappropriate to imply that the break that public schools take in December is solely about "Christmas" anymore.
28. Would you rather go to an exorcism or a step aerobics class? aerobics. I'm not naive or squeamish, but I've seen TV portrayals of exorcism-like events, and it's been really unpleasant. I wouldn't want to experience that in person.  
29. Do you believe in spells and curses? in a sense
30. What TV show does your family watch together? my family and I watch old movies together
31. What's on your calendar this year? this year?? June is going out with an exhausted whimper. July looks to be alternately crazy-busy and boring. August may involve some travel. That's as far ahead as I'm looking at this point.
32. Is anything ruining your life? What? "ruining my life"? Nah. I have a short list of stuff I'd love to change, some of which I'm working to change and some of which I'm working on accepting. 
33. How was life meant to be lived? it depends on the person. Some lives are meant to be lived quietly, others are meant to be lived as adventures. Mine, I think, looks quiet on the outside but is a tumult and sometimes a mess on the inside. It's the only chance that I have to find what I want on the other side.
34. What is your usual breakfast? Cheerios
35. If you had kids, would you worry about what they did online? definitely
36. Will you be "maxin' and relaxin'" this weekend? no, it was a surprisingly productive weekend. Groceries, laundry, breakfast out with family, pedicure, 30 miles on the bike, cleaning... 
37. If not, what are your weekend plans? this coming weekend is supposed to be alcohol indulgence and not much else 
38. Who has the most interesting story to tell: someone who used to fly to Asia as a drug trader, the CEO of Nike, a NYC homeless person, or a preacher's wife? depends what sort of stories one finds interesting, I suppose
39. What do you have a bad feeling about? I am not a big fan of my back lately
40. Do you have a lot to say? yup
41. If a smallpox vaccine was offered to you, would you take it? if it seemed like the right plan at the time, yes. At this point it seems like excessive medication for no good purpose.
42. Would you ever work at a kissing booth? no. Yuck.
43. How about a dunking booth? I don't think so
44. There is a woman who paints by stripping naked, rolling around in paint and then pressing her body against the canvas. What do you think of her art? it probably doesn't really look like what it is, and actually sounds intriguing. Super messy and potentially hazardous to her health, but kinda cool.
45. Have you ever bought something you saw on TV? I'm sure that I did at some point, yes
46. Have you gone mental? just now I did, when I read that question. Using the word "mental" in this way is so thoughtless.
47. Has anyone ever tried to 'save' you? not in so many words, that I know of
48. What do you smell like? right now: sweat. I'm just through with a workout.
49. What kind of soup do you eat? it varies by mood, hunger, and availability. I haven't had good French onion soup in far too long, though. That's something that I miss since I moved back up here--it was far more common in the Flat.
50. Would you rather go out or stay in? almost always, I'd prefer to stay in
51. What's your favorite song to hear on Halloween? I don't equate Halloween with music?
52. What song makes you feel all tingly, like you want to laugh and scream and cry? I don't know if there are any songs that make me feel like that. It seems a bit unbalanced.
53. If you were starting a website that was not about you, what would it be about? I thought everything was about me? I guess it might be about poetry, to the extent that this one isn't.
54. Do you ever take the long way just for fun? oh Hell yeah
55. '...and God said let there be ____ -- and there I was.' Fill in the blank, as if if you were talking about yourself. "overthinking"
56. What do you think of when you hear the word 'mill'? flour
57. What do you think of when you hear the name:
    ...Bob Dylan? Tangled Up in Blue
58. ...Henry Rollins? misanthrope, poet, man after my own heart
59. ...Will Smith? surprisingly sweet appearances on the Graham Norton show
60. ...Paul McCartney? oh my. Just watched a clip of his Carpool Karaoke with James Corden. That was so lovely.
61. What is one social disaster you have had? got drunk in a diner in the middle of the afternoon (in a snowstorm) with my crush, spent several hours flirting with him (at various points involving several other bar patrons in the process), but when I moved in to kiss him--he dodged it. Every time I think of it, it is freshly mortifying even after several years to absorb the humiliation. I still haven't figured out what his game was--but it clearly wasn't me.
62. Can you moonwalk? very badly
63. If a presidential candidate went on late night TV, picked up a guitar and rocked out on it and could really play, would that influence you to like/respect them more? I guess? Musical ability takes dedication and practice, which bodes well for someone who is going into politics. There are certainly worse things to be showing off.
64. If it was possible for people to instantly change from one sex to another, would everyone be straight in the end? uh, no. That's not how sexual preference works.
65. Would you change your sex? nope
66. Would you rather have a best friend OR a boyfriend/girlfriend on a Friday night? why is everything a choice?!?
67. Would a woman rather be complimented about her intelligence or her looks? depends on the circumstances and the woman, I suppose. There are times when I'd love to be recognized for what's between my ears, and other times when for the love of all that's good and holy, I'd vastly prefer for someone to realize that I'm more than a mobile brain.
68. Do you tend to think of the right thing to say after the moment is gone? yep. In French, this phenomenon is called L'esprit de l'escalier, and it's fairly universal.
69. Would you rather a potential mate have nice hair or nice legs? legs, I guess
70. What is one thing you thought you would enjoy, but actually didn’t? tiramisu
71. Be in the spotlight or in the shadows? shadows
72. What is your favorite part of the newspaper? I don't read the newspaper
73. What in your life has been an “acquired taste” for you? I don't think I'm meant to get along
74. Do you find sunlight makes you happier? sunlight is fine, but I prefer rain
75. If you could conquer one fear, it would be...? dogs, I guess. All my life (as long as I can remember) I've been afraid of them, and I'd like to know the freedom that other people feel who don't have that
76. What's the dumbest thing you've ever seen someone do or heard anyone has done? almost every day, I watch someone throw away, in big ways or tiny ways, the best thing that's ever happened to them. 
77. How do you feel about the fact that J-Lo earns 37 million dollars a year? *shrug*
78. Do you buy anything that contributes to her salary? maybe? It can be hard to know what sort of conglomerates exist out there in the universe.
79. Is J-Lo the ultimate ideal of what a woman should be? not mine. Clearly somebody's.
80. What is unforgettable beauty? beauty one cannot forget. It's different depending upon the person.
81. Worst fashion mistake ever: believing that others ought to dictate one's taste
82. What is your advice to someone on their first date? don't get too crazy - there's time for that later
    
83. Is there a musical performer more ridiculous than Avril Lavigne (I don't think there is)? definitely. LOTS.
84. What is the best late night talk show? Graham Norton
85. Are you afraid of total freedom? nope
86. Do you live in an invisible prison? everyone does. It's called "society".
87. Who do you feel distant from, that you used to be close to? as if I'm going to put a list on my blog
88. What would your reaction be if a total stranger called to say s/he loved you and told you that you were to pass the message on to others in a telephone call you make yourself? this is one of the many reasons that the Block function exists
89. Would you like to take a journey to Jupiter? nope, I've no interest in visiting an uninhabitable planet
90. Can you crack nuts in your bare hands? tempting...
91. Do you take walks at night? generally only on my treadmill
92. Beavis and Butthead or Daria? Daria, I guess, if I had to choose. I've been told that we resemble each other.
93. Cow or chicken? mmm, cow
94. Do you think you will visit China in this life? no
95. Are you having a happy day? this day has almost completely sucked
96. When was or will be your 'golden birthday' (when your age is the same as your birthdate, like turning 17 on the 17th)? about half a lifetime ago
97. Enlighten everyone with something profound: find your own profundity; I'm just trying to keep my head above water
98. When has the third time been the charm for you? I applied for my library job three times. Hired on the third application, I stayed for a dozen years. If that's a charm, then there you go.
99. What is kinda sick, but fun? love. Sometimes.

[From the 5000-question meme; this is the forty-second part (questions 4001-4100). The title quotation is by Henry Rollins.]