has “head”; I say it has a foamy
top. I say there is a goodly froth
in the uppermost portion,
that it seems almost whipped.
No, I don’t say that my beer
seems “whipped” or that it has
“head,” even as I never ask
if people are “coming."
"I am having a big party—
are you coming?” seems
horribly confusing to me.
I ask them if they “plan
to attend,” and when they
get there and begin to tap
my keg, I warn them that
they’ll get a lot of “froth”
or “foam” if they’re not careful.
And when they ask how
I’m doing, I never say,
anymore, that I feel “gay."
I just don’t put it that way.
I never use the phrase,
"standing erect,” either.
I say, “standing straight up."
I also never refer to my
donkey as an "ass,” nor do I say
that I’m planning to “ride
some ass” if what I mean
is that I’m going for a ride
on Mr. Fibitz. Nor do I ever
use the word “mount"
to indicate getting on Mr. Fibitz.
I don’t even say "getting on”
Mr. Fibitz anymore. It’s confusing
for the listener, and the listener
is whom I care about. However,
sitting erect on Mr. Fibitz I do feel gay,
happy enough to ride him for hours—
it’s just no longer what I say.
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