what worked well in the past may not be relevant or appropriate in the presence

202. When was a time that you thought you knew someone, but they turned out to be an entirely different person?  a couple of weeks ago, I found out that a friend since childhood is both more and less than I used to believe. The effect is disillusioning; we probably will not be friends anymore, which is sad after so long.

203. What’s the best marriage or relationship advice you’ve gotten?  "You (each) have to expect to put 70% of the work into the relationship to get 100% out."  

204. What’s your number one rule in a relationship?  there are no "rules" in a relationship

205. What is the role of a wife?  what is the role of a husband??

206. Where do you get your ideas about what constitutes a good relationship?  trial and error, like most people. Picking and choosing among the traits in the relationships around me. There is no one perfect person, no perfect couple, no perfect idea of how to make a good relationship.

207. What’s the best and worst things about being in a long-term relationship?  best: back-scratching

    worst: is there anyone on this whole godforsaken planet that can be trusted anymore?

208. Who in your life has the healthiest relationship with their SO?  no one needs to be called out, and no one needs to be raised to sainthood. It's always a work in progress.

209. What do you think are the worst and best things about having you as an SO?  worst: I have almost infinite capacity for recall     best: I'm incredibly quick to get ready (i.e. low maintenance)

210. How much work should a couple put into having a strong relationship?  less talk, more action

211. How serious should it get before a married couple goes to a marriage counselor?  marriage counseling works best before problems "get serious"—it's preferred as maintenance, not repair

213. What does a day in the life of a couple with a super healthy relationship look like?  depends on the couple, of course, and their days will all be different anyway

214. What can an SO do that would make you end a relationship?  depends on the relationship. Anyway, it's entirely theoretical.

215. What is something (beside appearance) that a person can do to become instantly more attractive to you?  correctly use language, and want to woo me with it

216. What group of people do you find it impossible to take seriously?  speed-walkers

217. What’s the most disturbing thing you’ve come to accept?  waking up before double-digits every day

218. What can someone say that always makes you cringe?  "You would make more money if you would practice law." Holy shit, I never thought of that.

219. What’s something small that makes a big difference?  sliced water chestnuts in chili mmm

220. What’s the most frustrating thing you encounter daily?  the world's stubborn refusal to bend to my needs

[cut from here; the title quotation is by Steven Redhead, from Life is a Cocktail]