7.15.2021

we creatures have about a billion and a half heartbeats to use

This morning I seem to hear the nearly inaudible 
whining grind of creation similar to the harmonics 
of pine trees in the wind. My outrageously lovely 
hollyhocks are now collapsing of their own weight, 
clearly too big for their britches. I’m making notes 
for a novel called The End of Man, and Not Incidentally, 
Women and Children, a fable for our low-living time. 
Quite early after walking the dogs, who are frightened 
of the sandhill cranes in the pasture, I fried some ham 
with a fresh peach, a touch of brown sugar and clove. 
Pretty good but I was wondering at how the dogs 
often pretend the sandhill cranes don’t exist despite 
their mighty squawks, the way we can’t hear 
the crying of coal miners and our wounded in Iraq. 
A friend on his deathbed cried and said it felt good. 
He was crying because he couldn’t eat, a lifelong habit. 
My little grandson Silas cried painfully until he was fed 
macaroni and cheese and then he was merry indeed. 
I’m not up to crying this morning over that pretty girl 
in the rowboat fifty-five years ago. I heard on the radio 
that we creatures have about a billion and a half 
heartbeats to use. Voles and birds use theirs fast 
as do meth heads and stockbrokers, while whales 
and elephants are slower. This morning I’m thinking 
of recounting mine to see exactly where I am. 
I warn the hummingbirds out front, “Just slow down,” 
as they chase me away from the falling hollyhocks. 
 

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