4.11.2022

I’ll be happy here and happy there, full of tea and tears

I watched an armory combing its bronze bricks 
and in the sky there were glistening rails of milk. 
Where had the swan gone, the one with the lame back? 
 
                    Now mounting the steps 
                    I enter my new home full 
                    of grey radiators and glass 
                    ashtrays full of wool. 

Against the winter I must get a samovar 
embroidered with basil leaves and Ukranian mottos 
to the distant sound of wings, painfully anti-wind, 
 
                    a little bit of the blue 
                    summer air will come back 
                    as the steam chuckles in 
                    the monster’s steamy attack 

and I’ll be happy here and happy there, full 
of tea and tears. I don’t suppose I’ll ever get 
to Italy, but I have the terrible tundra at least. 

                    My new home will be full 
                    of wood, roots and the like, 
                    while I pace in a turtleneck 
                    sweater, repairing my bike. 

I watched the palisades shivering in the snow 
of my face, which had grown preternaturally pure. 
Once I destroyed a man’s idea of himself to have him. 
 
                    If I’d had a samovar then 
                    I’d have made him tea 
                    and as hyacinths grow from 
                    a pot he would love me 

and my charming room of tea cosies full of dirt 
which is why I must travel, to collect the leaves. 
O my enormous piano, you are not like being outdoors 
 
                    though it is cold and you 
                    are made of fire and wood! 
                    I lift your lid and the mountains 
                    return, that I am good. 

The stars blink like a hairnet that was dropped 
on a seat and now it is lying in the alley behind 
the theater where my play is echoed by dying voices. 
 
                    I am really a woodcarver 
                    and my words are love 
                    which willfully parades in 
                    its room, refusing to move. 
 

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