those lovers who didn't choose at all but were, as it were, chosen

Not anyone who says, "I'm going to be 

    careful and smart in matters of love," 

who says, "I'm going to choose slowly," 

but only those lovers who didn't choose at all 

but were, as it were, chosen 

by something invisible 

and powerful and uncontrollable 

and beautiful and possibly even 

unsuitable—

only those know what I'm talking about 

in this talking about love. 

 

[Mary Oliver {1935-2019} 'Not Anyone Who Says' from Felicity]