7.09.2022

this new loving sets the groove

Fair Amy of the terraced house, 
   Assist me to discover 
Why you who would not hurt a mouse 
    Can torture so your lover. 
 
You give your coffee to the cat, 
    You stroke the dog for coming, 
And all your face grows kinder at 
    The little brown bees humming. 
 
But when he haunts your door . . . the town 
    Marks coming and marks going . . .
You seem to have stitched your eyelids down 
    To that long piece of sewing ! 
 
You never give a look, not you, 
    Nor drop him a
' Good morning, '
To keep his long day warm and blue, 
    So fretted by your scorning. 
 
She shook her head—' The mouse and bee 
    For crumb or flower will linger: 
The dog is happy at my knee, 
    The cat purrs at my finger. 
 
' But he . . .to him, the least thing given 
    Means great things at a distance; 
He wants my world, my sun, my heaven, 
    Soul, body, whole existence. 
 
' They say love gives as well as takes; 
    But I'm a simple maiden, —
My mother's first smile when she wakes 
    I still have smiled and prayed in. 
 
' I only know my mother's love 
    Which gives all and asks nothing; 
And this new loving sets the groove 
    Too much the way of loathing. 
 
' Unless he gives me all in change, 
    I forfeit all things by him: 
The risk is terrible and strange—
    I tremble, doubt, . . .
deny him. 
 
' He's sweetest friend or hardest foe, 
    Best angel or worst devil; 
I either hate or . . .
love him so, 
    I can't be merely civil ! 
 
' You trust a woman who puts forth 
    Her blossoms thick as summer's ? 
You think she dreams what love is worth, 
    Who casts it to new-comers? 
 
' Such love's a cowslip-ball to fling, 
    A moments pretty pastime; 
I give . . . all me, if anything, 
    The first time and the last time. 
 
' Dear neighbor of the trellised house, 
    A man should murmur never, 
Though treated worse than dog and mouse, 
    Till doated on for ever ! 
 
[Elizabeth Barrett Browning {1806-1861} 'Amy's Cruelty', from Sonnets from the Portuguese]

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