maybe that's what a person's personality is: the difference between the inside and outside

    I am (notoriously) a big fan of personality tests. Whether they are technically, scientifically accurate, they absolutely reveal something new, and in a new way. That in itself is valuable.

    Today, I took the big 5 test, currently available here. "There are a couple of things that make it...different. First, the Big Five doesn’t put people into neat personality 'types,' because that’s not how personalities really work. Instead, the quiz gives you a score on five different traits: extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, negative emotionality and openness to experience. For each of those traits, you’re graded on a scale from 0 to 100, depending on how strongly you associate with that trait. So, for example, this quiz won’t tell you whether you’re an extravert or an introvert—instead, it tells you your propensity toward extraversion. Every trait is graded on a spectrum, with a few people far out on the extremes and a lot of people in the middle."

"High openness to experience: You’ve probably tried on several personal styles and hobbies during your life, and your curious brain is actively seeking new things to explore. Your identity may be flexible and open to change, but you’re likely to find success in careers that value that—the arts, for instance. Don’t trap yourself in a 'Theater Kid' box, though. People with high openness also do well in careers that involve investigation and discovery. They might become scientists, lawyers or investigative journalists—basically weaponizing their intellectual curiosity and willingness to try new things and explore new ideas. Be aware, though, that dangerous drugs are among the things you’re more likely to be willing to try. Substance use disorders are a serious risk."

"Moderate agreeableness: You have to be pretty danged un-agreeable to truly count as a low agreeableness person. A lot of the outcomes that correlate with low agreeableness, like being chronically bullied (or bullying) or having a criminal record, don’t kick in until someone’s score is down in the 10th percentile. So even though all the Big Five traits operate on a spectrum—with the people in the middle tending to experience a little of what both poles feel to the extreme—the population of people who count as 'moderately agreeable' is particularly large. (It’s just that some of you may have a little less tendency toward empathy, compassion and trust of your fellow human beings than others.) You’re no goody-goody, but you’re also not what the professionals might refer to as 'a selfish jerk.'"

"Moderate conscientiousness: The highly conscientious are detail-oriented goal-setters who dot their i’s, cross their t’s and keep detailed spreadsheets of all the times they did that. They tend to do well at work, be productive at home and lean toward being religious. People with low conscientiousness, on the other hand, are slovenly types who smoke and drink and tend to not finish the chores they said they’d get done. There are benefits and drawbacks to people on both ends of the spectrum, but if we had to choose a roommate, we’d pick you—someone in the middle."

"High negative emotionality: Conflict in relationships doesn’t have to be inherently destructive, and thank goodness for that, because your tendency toward anger, frustration and anxiety means your relationships probably have plenty of tension. What’s more, you’re likely carrying that predisposition toward conflict with you from relationship to relationship. The good news is that other parts of your personality affect relationship quality, too. Nobody is only one trait. For example, higher scores on extraversion are correlated with satisfying marriages, so a person with high negative emotionality and high extraversion might have a very different relationship history than someone high in negative emotionality and low in extraversion."

"Low extraversion: We live in a society that generally values and rewards extraversion, and that can make life tough for a more withdrawn person. Science tends to emphasize the downer aspects of your personality—you probably have difficulty making friends and finding people to date, for instance. You might also have a low opinion of your own looks. But being an introvert isn’t all bad. Some scientists think low extraversion has protected humans from disease—you can't pick up a bug from people if you avoid people. And one study even found a lower prevalence of extraversion in places where contagious diseases were historically common. One of the best bits of advice for the less extraverted is to find spaces where they get to live the way they want and where their personalities are valued. That’s probably why being less extraverted is correlated with choosing, and excelling at, jobs that require working alone. And there is a higher prevalence of introverts in the American West. Have you considered a career in ranching?"

[the title quotation is by Jonathan Safran Foer, from Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close]