if...so much hope and dread hung in the balance on those two little blips in the alphabet! A chasm in fact!

        If... 

 

...you could rid the earth of one thing, what would it be? 

    hard-shelled beetles—like June bugs. I know I should respect all of God's creatures and all that, but they are just SO revolting! 

 

...you could be more ambitious in only one aspect of your life, what would it be? 

    money, of course. Better at saving, at avoiding over-spending, at choosing the right investments. Honing the sales stock in my eBay store. 

 

...you had to name the one most important ingredient of human beauty, what would you say it is?

    focused attention. The ability and willingness to look another person in the eye and listen.

 

...you had to name the single most erotic part of the human body, what would it be? 

    the brain. It's impossible (for me) to be even remotely attracted to someone unless there is an intellectual connection. In fact, the most attracted I've been is to someone not traditionally handsome, but infused with a broad body of interests and the quickest, sharpest wit.

 

...you had to name the least erotic part of the human body, what would it be? 

    the nose. I'm not certain why, but I've always been a little creeped out by noses. And there was an awkward and horrid moment with someone that solidified that feeling.

 

...you were to add a thirteenth month to the year, where would you insert it? 

    between April and May. The weather is pretty much perfect, with the furnace off and the A/C not yet needed. Birds are chirping, flowers are blooming, and the world comes out of its grumpy slumber.

 

...you could have only one part of your body massaged every day, what part would you choose? 

    shoulders. I'm tempted to say hands, because there is very little that feels better than someone else massaging my hands—it's the one part of the body that is hard to massage for oneself. Also tempted to say head, because nothing beats a gentle but firm scalp massage to beat a headache. However, day after day the muscles that trouble me most are in my neck and shoulders. A good, regular massage would help a great deal.

 

[from If2: 500 New Questions for the game of life; the title quotation is by E.A. Bucchianeri, from Vocation of a Gadfly]