there is no good singing, there is only present and absent

1. If you could have the power to hypnotize anyone for a day, who would you pick and what would you have them do? 

    I would save this power for the perfect time: to hypnotize the students at the nearby university to shut the Hell up. This last weekend there were several outdoor athletic events, accompanied by blaring shitty music, a hyperactive public address announcer, and—most annoyingly—a fucking air horn, which ought to be outlawed and used to disrupt the idiot who brought it anytime they are trying to relax or concentrate. They are a crew of annoying, pretentious assholes who behave as if the world belongs to them.

2. If you had to recall the nicest compliment ever given to you, what would it be? 

WTF

    a college fling told me I'm not conventionally pretty (ouch) but I am 'librarian sexy'. I thought it was a sort of backhanded compliment at the time, but (especially having worked in a library for fifteen years) have come to realize that it can be high praise.

    Caveat: many, or perhaps most, or maybe even all, of my former colleagues would be profoundly offended by this designation, even when not applied to themselves. As with anything else that's intended to be a compliment, before using this one must be cognizant of one's audience. In other words: handle with care.

3. If you could go back to high school to relive one event exactly as it happened, what would you pick? 

    the victory parade for which our band played, when the state's MLB team won the World Series. I wish I could remember every minute of that day—and take some pictures, then, while I relived it. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity.

    And if you could go back to high school to relive one event as you wish it had been, what would it be? 

    I would have gone to prom with the guy who had asked me, instead of blowing that chance by being a willful, inconsiderate, selfish idiot.

4. If you could commission any living author to write a new book, who would you choose, and what would you have them write about? 

    it's a tie between George R.R. Martin finishing the f'ing Song of Ice and Fire series and Patrick Rothfuss finishing the f'ing Kingkiller Chronicle. Just thinking about this makes me angry. Doesn't every reader have a really hard time with unrequited love from a book series?

5. If you could forget one thing, what would it be? 

    the lyrics to the Spanish version of the song "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt" (i.e. "Juan Paco Pedro de la Mar")—and, for what it's worth, the English lyrics, and maybe all memory that the song exists at all—because the tempo perfectly matches my walking pace when I'm alone. Once I realized that, which made sense at the time by the way, I haven't had a moments' walking peace. 

6. If you were to identify the most important quality in a friend, what would you say it is? 

    presence. Not 100% of the time, and not at a second's notice, but the ability and willingness to really be there when needed. That's what makes people want to be friends, I think. 

7. If you had to choose a television personality to be president of the United States, who would you pick?

    I would be thrilled to follow the ticket of Stewart & Colbert. I would even get a yard sign.

 [from If2: 500 New Questions for the game of life; the title quotation is from Jeff Buckley]