- Buy a house. (No, really.) In town, 2 BR/2 BA, attached 2-car garage. Small yard. Not on a corner lot.
- Buy another house, in the hills, on a dozen acres and flanked by old-growth trees, with a view of the river out back. 4 BR, 5 BA; game room; sun room (four-season) for plants. A "baker's kitchen." Detached four-car garage.
- Buy five more cars, of increasing ridiculousness and cost, and decreasing practicality.
- Quit my damn job.
- Pay off my best friends' bills, and buy them some frivolous things that they will like, and that I would love to give: jewelry, cat couches, books GALORE. Massages and pedicures. Another motorcycle. Running shoes.
And beg/force/weasel a couple of those friends into leaving their jobs, too. Life is too short to be miserable, if we can avoid it. - Get a big stack of $50 bills to stash in plain sight: in children's books at the library, under the salt shaker at a restaurant; in envelopes mailed to people I barely know. At the bus stop. In the laundromat.
- Endow some scholarships here and there, in the names of those who've influenced me greatly and would be honored by the gesture.
- Take a few vacations. Give a few vacations.
- Tip extravagantly, in places where it doesn't happen but would come in handy.
- Set up standard haircut appointments for my favorite boy--and in-home nail treatments for his sister.
- Buy all the preppiest clothes I can find (J.Peterman and J.Crew and J.Jill), and some giraffe boots, and about fifty dresses from Modcloth. And SO many shoes....
- Shop the heck out of my favorite stores, buying as much local as possible.
- Sleep!
[the title quotation is by Oscar Wilde]
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