Thinking in Phrases, not Sentences

I've always wanted to... write an advice column.

When I was on lunch today (from 2:00-2:30) the library's large meeting room looked like... Barbie/Tonka Hell. (Alternate version: Wal-Mart disgorged its toy aisles from a height of 1000 ft., along with 10 bags of Cheddar Goldfish.)

When in doubt or half asleep, I wear... blue, preferably cornflower. It brings out my eyes, apparently, which are the only positive memory that I have of my maternal grandfather.

An embarrassing thing to admit these days... is that I'm from Minnesota, damn it, so I know it doesn't pay for me to get all worked up about national politics yet; whomever I get attached to will lose anyway. See, e.g., Mondale & Dukakis. I'll wait until the thing heats up on a more country-wide scale, thanks, before I even identify the teams.

The sentences that most effectively rendered me silent... came from Bill of "Marry Me Bill" fame. I broke up with him by taking the easy way out - writing him a letter - immediately before leaving for two weeks in Cocoa Beach, FL. I thought he'd have moved on to some chippy on his own level (ahem) long before I returned. Alas, I was sleeping the night I got back and he broke into the house - into Maureen and Jim's house! - and crept downstairs to the bed where I was sleeping, woke me up by poking my foot and saying, "Aim. Aim. Aim. Aim." I thought it was a very annoying nightmare. It was Bill, and I was awake. Damn it. Once I was truly awake and yelling - albeit whispering - "GET OUT, YOU IDIOT!" he said, "Calm down. Stop talking." I stopped talking, amazed that he sounded so, I don't know, not stupid, I guess. I looked at him. He looked at me. Took a deep breath. Stuttered a bit, then said, all in a rush, "I know you didn't mean to break up with me, you'd been really sick and on penicillin and you were out of your head with that cold, I know we really had something special, I know you didn't mean it so I've decided to let it go this time, I forgive you, we can get back together." You forgive me? Say what?! Yeah, I couldn't say anything. I just gaped at him, and he kissed me on the forehead and left. (I'll bet you're wondering how I managed to finally get rid of him....)

The best band you've never heard of... is Hunters & Collectors.

What I want most right now is... for the processing snafu to be solved.
PROBLEM: There is no one person to do the job of "processing clerk".
POTENTIAL SOLUTIONS:
1. Hire person A or person B, both of whom have applied for the position and have interviews scheduled.
2. Hire person C, who has previously expressed interest in the position but has since expressed reluctance to apply.
3. Screw hiring altogether, cajole the She Who Holds Power into increasing me to full time status, and doing the goddamned job myself and not dealing with the posting, accepting applications, interviewing, declining, hiring, and training crap.
POTENTIAL PROBLEMS WITH POTENTIAL SOLUTIONS:
1. Person A has expressed no interest in the position itself, just in the flexibility that it offers. Person B has expressed no interest in the position itself, just in the hours and pay that it offers.
2. Person C has reasons to take or not take the job that have nothing to do with the job, and I don't want to push. I know it's inappropriate and unfair to push. But I also feel a little pinched because I was responding to C's request for information when we talked about the job. And I HAVE TO fill the fucking position. Because I'm SO sick of doing it myself, and I HATE thinking about the possibility of having to keep doing it or to post it externally. I just want to have the thinking about it part of it DONE with already.
3. I'm already busy, stressed, tired, and stretched thin enough. I don't need another 5.5 hours a week of work to add to it. I'm already at least a day behind on getting my damned thesis to Michigan. This was not supposed to be the job I'd have for the rest of my life. Why am I even thinking of making it full time?!

The thing I like to eat that most people don't like to eat... is a tie between Circus Peanuts and Apple Jacks. No, I don't eat them at the same time.

My dream car... is a 2-seater Jaguar. Or an MG Midget. Although I knew a man with an Alfa Romeo Spyder once....