not even close to safe for work

Go to UrbanDictionary.com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the first definition it gives you.

1. Your full first name?
   to take, hold, or steal your heart. a person who is a soulmate. a good lover. - awwwwwww
2. Your age?
   The act of doggy style, hitting it from the back ferociously, sliding up to the bumper in order to saddle up and ride. - hahahahahahaha...
3. What should you be doing?
   A worldwide slave labour organisation used to control modern man and prevent independent thought from occurring in any form. This is the reason it's much harder to make anything of yourself working in creative arts, such as acting and singing - the government sees anyone more popular than them as a threat to their power. It is also an ingenious creation to make placebos such as computers and photocopiers look important to our way of life. Some may argue that the workplace is designed to build character and learn about teamwork...others prefer to think of it as the perfect place to practise your aiming skills as you throw ball after ball of scrunched up paper into the bin in the corner, then make a little competition out of it with fellow colleagues. - um, yeah.
4. Hometown:
   [undefined] - as well it should be.
5. Month of your Birthday:
   The idea of perfection. The 8th Month of the year in certain European and Asian cultures signifies greatness in achieving perfection, or something close to it. - um huh.
6. Last person you talked to on the phone:
   The parent that takes the most shit. Sure, if you had a shitty father, then go ahead and bitch, but not all of us did. Some of us had great fathers, who really loved us, and weren't assholes. Honestly, if you could see how much damage a mother could do to one's self esteem, you wouldn't even place so much blame on "dear old dad." - defensive much?
7. Your last name:
   Spanish origins, any person with such surname similar to has either a massive schlong or a great breasts. - ROFL
8. Your middle name:
   An irresistible beautiful girl who can make her very special sexy friend hard and horny and is proud of it. - good gravy. These children need a hobby!

[snatched from The Cat, who got it here]