I fell asleep almost immediately after slipping into bed last night. How do I know? Because I saw the clock less than 40 minutes later, when I woke from one of the worst nightmares I've ever had. Every inch of skin that's got hair was goose-bumped, and I had to get out of bed and walk around for 5 or 10 minutes before I could even think of trying to sleep again. I was very close to calling someone to talk me down - but, seriously, who do you call at 1:20 AM because you've had a nightmare?! Yeah, more backsliding, since the first person that I thought to call (to the point that my first conscious thoughts were "phone!" and "6!", since that was his speed-dial) was Johnnie. Blargh. Sort of strange that my second thought was to call my brother, who would have laughed his ass off after blistering my ear for waking him up for such a stupid reason. This is the same loving sibling who once, after I'd let him know I was having a bad dream when he was babysitting a very young me, let me come sleep near him. Not in his bed, or in his room, but on the floor in the hallway, outside his (closed) door. Oh, I know he loves me. Just, differently.
The content of the nightmare is completely gone, for what that's worth. I'm just left with the prickly sense that it'll return if I let my guard down. Like too-frequent visitors (especially those with questionable taste in music), or strep throat.
If I've never said this before: steroids are SO cool. All last week I had that plaguey sore throat thing that I get every couple of months, where one of my tonsils swells three times its normal size and is so painful that I can hardly swallow (or allow any pressure on it, making sleep almost impossible). It started Monday night and became steadily worse through the week; by Thursday I was in agony and called the doctor. The earliest appointment that I could get was Saturday. My doctor diagnosed a throat infection and sinus infection, and as a bonus he verified that I had indeed broken my toe. My antibiotic and Prednisone prescriptions awaited me when I arrived at the pharmacy, and I took the first dose shortly thereafter. I felt better almost immediately, and the swelling began to abate right away. I had almost no symptoms as of Sunday afternoon. I couldn't be happier with my medical treatment in general, I adore my doctor, and this experience is a perfect example. And, seriously, steroids are awesome. My tonsils are almost human-sized again!
I'm "pre-packing" for a trip. For, I should say, what looks to be my "long summer trip." Siiiiiiiggghhhhhhh. I'm sure it's unproductive to wish that my life would change sufficiently for me to vacation somewhere, oh, I don't know, NOT familial. Sometimes I feel like a very salty soup. Bah. Anyway, I'm not exactly packing, but gathering stuff together for the eventual packing of same. Sorting and organizing. And listening to the bones of a mix CD, which is neither here nor there. Trying not to think too far ahead. Wondering how much control we have over ourselves, really. Mumbler and I seem to be in the same sort of mental ... test, I guess, right now. Wanting mind to overcome matter. Matter to be damned. Wanting to be stronger than our (individual) [I mean, seriously, these two circumstances could NOT be further removed from each other!] wanting. Is it possible to decide to stop ___, and then to stop, for real? I suppose it depends on whether it's what you want to do, or what you've got no control over. Guess 'control' is the point.
The travelers have returned, so my kitty-sitting stint has ended. I'm glad they're back (it was a long trip and not for happy reasons) but I'm also sad to be letting go of my daily dose of blatant love. The froofy one made no bones about his adoration for me, and though his sister was more parsimonious in her displays, she allowed me some liberties that aren't normal for her. If I gain permission from their people, I'll post photos or videos. They're too adorable.
The dryer has stopped, so there's a chance that I can get some sleep. I'm going for it.
Oy! Need your addy! ReGenesis secured! Fire away at the usual place!
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