try to find somebody whose life is giving them vodka

March 8: foment

While trying to tamp down the unrest that was being fomented next to me, I inadvertently left a 30% tip for the nervous waiter. It may have helped his night less onerous.

March 9: roman à clef

The last novel that I read was a thinly-disguised roman à clef, and I'm still unsure whether frankly admitting that it's a memoir would have improved its relative quality.

---

• Do you think Russell Brand's attractive?
  not at all. He's one of those people at whom I can't stand to look for very long, in fact. (Sorry, dude.)
• Have you ever seen the youtube video, "Keeping your refrigerator stocked will get you many women"? If not, I suggest you go watch it.
  I, in turn, suggest that you learn to capitalize and punctuate.
• Have you heard Lady Gaga's song, "Judas"? What do you think of it?
  nope. Not a fan.
• When was the last time you rode a bike? Do you remember where you went?
  it was a very, very long time ago. I have reasons to dislike bicycles.
• Do you enjoy jogging or would you rather just take a long walk?
  is there an option C? If not, I'll take the walk.
• Have you ever seen V for Vendetta? Did you enjoy it? What was your favorite scene?
  nope. Not a fan of the genre.
• Would you rather drink Vitamin Water or Powerade/Gatorade?
  no, thanks. Water's fine.
• Do you currently own any white out?
  I do; there's a bottle of 'ivory' beneath the monitor, in fact.
• Do you wear lipstick? If so, what color is your favorite to wear?
  rarely. If I do, I'll wear Vincent Longo Lip Stain (in Liquid Kiss or Baby Boo) with Bloom Cosmetics Lip Definer in Lusciously Lined.
• I still enjoy watching old episodes of SpongeBob. Are there any shows mostly intended for a younger audience that you watch?
  nope. I don't really watch very much broadcast TV, though.
• I read in a magazine that shoulder pads are coming back. Are you happy to hear this or do you not find them to be very attractive?
  my shoulders really don't need padding, but I'm sure that some peoples' lives will be completed by this news.
• If you've played the Sims, which expansion pack was your favorite? (Out of all three games). If you haven't played the Sims, what's a video game you enjoy playing?
  I don't SIM, but my best friends do. As for me, I'm amused by more basic pursuits, e.g. bubbleshooter (and getting people hooked on bubbleshooter).
• What's something that you made all on your own and are incredibly proud of?
  my plant family, I suppose?
• Chelsea Handler: hysterical or a bore? Have you ever read any of her books? If so, which ones?
  I don't see the attraction, but I've neither read the books nor seen the shows. No desire.
• What are you opinions on Sudoku? Does it blow your mind or do you enjoy playing it?
  I've never. Ever. Won a game. Numbers and I just don't get along.
• How much did you pay for the last movie you saw in theaters? Was it worth it?
  no clue. It was a foreign film, in a "big city", about 5 years ago. But it was also a crap movie and fairly late at night. And I was drunk enough that I don't have a clue whether I paid or someone else paid or we snuck in. It's clearly a memorable occasion, eh? I really need to see another movie at the theater so I can tell a better story one of these days.
• How much does it suck to go back to school or work after a long vacation?
  110%

[part five of several--from The Cat, who got it here' the title quotation is by Ron White, and reads in its entirety: "If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody whose life is giving them vodka, and have a party."]