the bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists

May 14: soporific

One of the tasks I've been working on for the past couple of weeks is so soporific that I have to dole it out in very short bursts or risk nodding off at my desk.

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1. 

   "You're leading with that?!"
   

   My uncle once: held me on his lap while playing poker, which led to an absolutely adorable picture. See?
   
2. Never in my life: have I eaten a squid.
3. When I was five: I was a perfect square: 46 pounds and 46 inches.
4. High School was: dreadful at times, and heaven at times. I'd love to go back, if only to feel those butterflies one more time.
5. I will never forget: the first time I drove by myself. It wasn't momentous--I was buying a card for my mom, for Mother's Day--but the way that I felt was a sea-change.
6. I once met: a vegan who persisted in telling me that "Meat is Murder" until one of my good friends finally screamed in his face, "no, meat is DINNER, asshole!"
7. There’s this girl I know who: can't seem to decide whether she likes me or not. I like her a great deal. I do wish she'd make up her mind; the push and pull is awfully wearying.
8. Once, at a bar: I swallowed a glass of beer in one gulp, winning ~$50 and the admiration of a slew of skanky drunk dudes.
9. By noon, I’m usually: awake. Barely.
10. Last night: I couldn't sleep. Tossed and turned for a couple of hours before I finally dropped off.
11. If only I had: selective amnesia
12. Next time I go to church: will likely be a wedding or a funeral. Hey, why lie?
13. An artist I appreciate as an adult, who I didn't "get" before: is Joni Mitchell. Her version of "The River" is the absolute best.
14. What worries me most: is usually money.
15. When I turn my head left, I see: my phone, the book I'm reading, and my new metal straight-edge.
16. When I turn my head right, I see: my camera, the iPod cable, and a CD called "Jac is back...."
17. You know I’m lying when: I nearly fall out of my chair, wide-eyed and flustered.
18. What I miss most about the 80s: is the jeans. ha ha
19. If I was a character in Shakespeare, I’d be: Ophelia, of course. I wouldn't dare be anyone else...Seymour!
20. By this time next year: I'll be a mere shell of my former self. Eat your hearts out, foolish boys.

[From The Cat, who got it here; the title quotation is a Japanese proverb]