ride hard or stay home

A boring Spielberg, a couple of Westerns, a rom/com, and a dude flick (for "men of a certain age").... 

The Terminal (2004) - "An Eastern European tourist unexpectedly finds himself stranded at JFK airport and must take up temporary residence there."
Source: I borrowed the DVD from my parents' collection
I watched it because: it's Tom Hanks - how bad could it be?
IMDB: 7.4/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 61% Audience: 74%

notable quote: "I usually read history books. They're long and cheap and usually about men killing each other."
story: based on a true story, but still silly. Man from a tiny country essentially loses his citizenship while in the air because of a coup, and thus loses his travel visa. Can't enter the US without the visa, but also cannot travel by air. Stuck.
visuals: famous people looking pretty in an airport that looks like a ritzy mall
costumes, hair & makeup: everything appears fresh and clean and wonderful
acting: Kumar Pallana (as Gupta Rajan, the grumpy janitor) is the best of the bunch

intangibles: there was not one moment of conflict or compelling storytelling here, just a sort of droning, eavesdropping snoozefest

overall: not recommended

West of the Divide (1934) - "Ted Hayden impersonates a wanted man and joins Gentry's gang only to learn later that Gentry was the one who killed his father. He saves Virginia Winters' dad's ranch from Gentry and also rescues his long-lost brother 'Spud.'"
Source: I borrowed the DVD from my parents' collection
I watched it because: it's really short (54 min.) and it's John Wayne - how bad could it be?
IMDB: 5.3/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: N/A% Audience: 37%

notable quote: "You got her here just in time. A small artery's been severed - however, I don't think it's very serious."
story: wackadoodle.  Wayne and Gabby Hayes (Dusty Rhodes) conveniently discover that Wayne is a virtual match for a bad guy involved with the death of his father and disappearance of his brother. It does downhill from there.
visuals: basic early Western look
costumes, hair & makeup: no costume changes
acting: Hayes is the ultimate sidekick

intangibles: there are many better ways to spend an hour
overall: not recommended

The Truth about Cats & Dogs (1996) - "A successful veterinarian & radio show host with low self-esteem asks her model friend to impersonate her when a handsome man wants to see her."
Source: I borrowed it from my parents' collection
I watched it because: I've seen it before but not for a while (maybe only at the theater when it was released?)
IMDB: 6.2/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 85% Audience: 57%

notable quote: "...someone you might not even have noticed...that you wouldn't look at more than once—if you love them, can become the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. All you want is to be near them."
story: a silly story, relying on deception as it does to move things along, yet romantic and witty
visuals: bright & shiny
costumes, hair & makeup: loopy and Bohemian. It is a product of its era.
acting: Janeane Garofalo (Abby) is great in this. 

intangibles: sweet and funny, if a little dumb
overall: recommended

Two Rode Together (1961) - "A corrupt marshal is pressured by his Army friend into negotiating the release of white captives of the Comanches, but finds that their reintegration into society has its consequences."
Source: I borrowed the DVD from my parents' collection
I watched it because: it's Jimmy Stewart - how bad could it be?
IMDB: 6.8/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 80% Audience: 52%

notable quote: "These people, they smile at me and show their teeth, but it's the eyes that bite."
story: there's a lot going on here but it doesn't all make sense. Is it a cautionary tale? A history lesson? Redemption? Love story?
visuals: 1960s Western quality
costumes, hair & makeup: a couple of ridiculous toupees and Shirley Jones in pigtail braids
acting: Richard Widmark (First Lt. Jim Gary) is really good here

intangibles: didn't hate it, but it's definitely not my first pick
overall: recommended with reservations

Wild Hogs (2007) - "A group of suburban biker wannabes looking for adventure hit the open road, but get more than they bargained for when they encounter a New Mexico gang called the Del Fuegos."
Source: I borrowed the DVD from my parents' collection
I watched it because: I've been liking the Travolta movies that I've seen recently, and this one is reputed to be pretty funny
IMDB: 5.8/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 14% Audience: 61%

notable quote: "Ya know it's gonna hurt a little bit, but that's all part of the experience."
story: four metrosexuals go for a motorcycle road trip to prove they are still young and manly, getting into trouble when they inadvertently piss off a gang
visuals: objectively gorgeous scenery 
costumes, hair & makeup: fun and funny, well-supporting each character
acting: Peter Fonda (Damien Blade) is a treat here

intangibles: I liked it. There are some petty annoyances (William H. Macy's character is totally irritating) and it wanders a bit into stereotypes, but overall it's just a good time.
overall: recommended

[the title quotation is from Wild Hogs]