12.25.2022

And I hid behind books

I grew up hiding from the other children. 
I would break off from the pack 
on its patrol of the streets every Saturday 
 
and end up alone behind a hedge 
or down a dim hallway in a strange basement. 
No one ever came looking for me, 
which only added to the excitement. 
 
I used to hide from adults, too, 
mostly behind my mother's long coat 
or her floral dress depending on the season. 
 
I tried to learn how to walk 
between my father's steps while he walked 
like the trick poodle I had seen on television. 
 
And I hid behind books, 
usually one of the volumes of the encyclopedia 
that was kept behind glass in a bookcase, 
the letters of the alphabet in gold. 
 
Before I knew how to read, 
I sat in an armchair in the living room 
and turned the pages, without a clue 
 
about the worlds that were pressed 
between D and F, M and O, W and Z. 
 
Maybe this explains why 
I looked out the bedroom window 
first thing this morning 
at the heavy trees, low gray clouds, 
 
and said the word gastropod out loud, 
and having no idea what it meant 
went downstairs and looked it up 
then hid in the woods from my wife and our dog. 
 
[Billy Collins {1941- } 'Evasive Maneuvers', from Ballistics]

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