learn something; that's the only thing that never fails

1 If you could erase one past experience, what would it be? 

    working at the law firm. I didn't really know the person for whom I was working. That wouldn't typically be an issue, since most work is more than just the boss, y'know? But that particular setup made it impossible. I was working from home, he varied between offices in two states (30 miles apart), the other person at my level working from the other office, and the manager working from my local office. I was driving in to pick up supplies and work a few times a week. It was a full-time job with 40 hours' stated expectation, but exceeded almost the entire time I was there. There was never a clear-cut plan for communication, so it varied between the boss coming to my home to give me work, to me needing to contact him for instructions or even tasks, and usually falling somewhere in the middle and involving a combination of text messages, phone calls, emails, and command performances at the office. 

    It was a boring, depressing, uncomfortable job, working with two people I disliked (and one who left within a month of my arrival, escaping to greener pastures), often being expressly told that I was getting the shitty tasks and the annoying clients. And I was expected to use my personal phone for work, so those irritating clients had my number and didn't hesitate to use it. 

    I left the job in June, 2022. The funny thing? Clients STILL call me, hoping to get service that they can't get from the firm. Seriously, how dumb do you have to be, to think it's normal to hound your lawyer's employees to help you three years later?! (If I liked them at all, I will answer and redirect them. If they were really annoying, I just block their number.)

    As ought to be clear by now, if I could burn that entire experience down into a chunk of carbon and throw it into a volcano, I would be happy indeed.

 

2 What are some new things you want to try? 

    • a colleague told me this week about his favorite Chinese hot pot restaurant, and it sounded like a fun experience unlike anything I've experienced. Alas, San Francisco is not on my itinerary anytime soon.

    • I'm thinking of moving from Apple Music to Amazon Music. Not a huge change given how small a part of my life it is, but a big deal in terms of philosophy.

    • rather than buying packets of taco seasoning, I'm going to make my own 

    • I've enrolled in (yet another) health program through my insurance plan. Pro: it's not drug-based, there are no in-person appointments, and it came with a free scale. Con: the scale is "smart" (so every time I weigh in, the data is transmitted not only to my "health coach" but also 

to Amazon, to which it is intricately connected; the aforementioned coach is just one part of the intensely interactive program that has resulted in dozens of notifications each day since I signed up—and the actual program only began today!; and, when push comes to shove, there's really nothing new under the sun. Will this program work, or is it another temporary balm to a forever wound?

    •  a friend clued me in on an alternative to New Year's resolutions, which is a BINGO card for the year. Ideally equal parts fun and work, it is a way to identify goals and dreams, plans and wishes, that doesn't feel like a homework assignment or an unrealistic fantasy. Each box is its own reward, and crossing out a row or column can mean either a heightened sense of accomplishment or a treat, earned. I did create a card like the one pictured here but since it's a work in progress, I'm not sharing it yet.

 

3 What was your first job, and what did you learn from it? 

    bakery clerk in a grocery store. I learned so much! How to show up on time to a job, even when working at 4:AM. The intricacies of proofing, baking, and frying donuts. Working with difficult people, ver. 1.0. Balance dressing for a job that makes you smell like a piece of fried chicken while at the same time trying to look adorable around the 100 high school and college guys also on staff. How to mop a floor. Cake decorating. Flexibility (show up expecting to lay out product for the next day's baking shift and instead decorate a dozen cakes and fry chicken for the hot case). How to sober up quickly when arriving at work too close to the end of the previous night out. (A can of Coke and a couple of strictly-fresh sour cream donuts did a marvelous job, for what that's worth.)

 

4 What’s a song that always makes you think of someone?      

    Tonic, "Irish"—the only song that makes me think of Chris that also makes me smile with no lump in the throat 

I won't die for England!
Not for England...

 

5 What’s the funniest cooking disaster someone in your family had? 

    we'd borrowed an ice cream maker—the old style, with a hand crank—from my aunt and uncle, when I was around 5, I think? It was a big deal because we weren't really the make-it-yourself-treats type of family. We poured in the (relatively expensive) ingredients and took turns cranking. I don't recall how long it took, but there was some waiting before we were able to pull it out and try some. Whomever had poured in the vanilla extract had mistakenly grabbed the maple flavoring, so we ended up with a gallon+ of maple ice cream. None of us disliked maple, but had anticipated homemade vanilla with various toppings, like strawberries or chocolate syrup. 

 

6 What’s the most surprising thing that really interests you? 

    I'm considering learning to read (and incidentally to speak) German. Portuguese or Italian, or even French, might make more sense, given my grounding in Spanish, but a lot of audiobooks that I've been into lately have been read by German narrators. Understanding the language might make it easier and more interesting to dig further into some of my favorite subjects.

 

7 What’s your go-to song for commuting? 

    the best thing about music is the infinite variety. And one of the best things about my car is its CD player (remember those?), which allows me to listen to my old playlists (including those gifted by my former physical therapist, and Adelheide, and Chris) on endless rotation. 

    Also, I have not had a commute for more than four years!

 

8 Have you ever lied about liking a family member’s cooking? 

    not an immediate family member, for sure. None of them has ever cooked anything for me that hasn't lived up to billing.

    I have a friend who cooks for me often, and I sometimes have to be diplomatic when giving reviews. They don't cook to my taste now and then, but the friendship is far more important than my comfort and specifications in any one meal. I won't eat what I actively dislike, but there are times when I take a deep breath before and a big drink of water after certain foods cooked certain ways.  

 

[from here, divided and adapted; the title quotation is by T.H. White, from The Once and Future King]