1 Which means more to you: knowing you've done something amazing or being recognized for doing it?
the knowing, not the being known. Satisfaction and meaning have far less to do with what other people think or do than with self-awareness.
2 When was the last time you felt real excitement and passion in your work? What about your life in general? How important is passion to you?
my work is exciting, and I do feel passionate about it. It is challenging, fascinating, fun, and rewarding. Of course, as in every job there are moments when it is maddening, dull, or seemingly inconsequential, but those times are rare.
Life, in general, is not so exciting or passionate. I live a quiet existence. Again, it has periods when it's boring or even lonely. But that—all of that—is preferable to some other alternatives.
3 Which would you rather have: one intimate soulmate but no other good friends, or no soulmate but lots of good friends?
a soulmate is an unexpected blessing, a force of chemistry and physics and destiny. There is little in life more treasured than a good friend, of which a soulmate is just one variety. It's a logical impossibility to imagine a world without good friends.
"Lots" of good friends, though? Nope. I'm not capable of spreading myself that thin.
4 If advanced technologies enabled everyone to enjoy the material benefits of an upper-middle-class lifestyle without having to work, how would you change your life? What would most concern you about such a bountiful world?
this is the Star Trek conundrum. In a world with no poverty, discrimination, or abjectness, what is the motivation for success? If all one really needs is a government-issue replicator, what's the point in striving? Is the mere concept of 'success' meaningless, if one doesn't become successful in order to have more than others, or even so that one can make something better for someone else? If life is already 98% easy and smooth and stress-free, why put oneself out at all?
I'm not an overly ambitious person, and have some problems with people who prioritize "the material benefits of an upper-middle-class lifestyle" over more internal concerns, like family and self-awareness and consideration. I do firmly believe that a person needs a reason to wake up each day, a purpose in life, some actual meaning.
5 Is there anything in your life too personal to discuss with others? If so, have you ever made the mistake of trying?
ha! Yes, some things are too personal.
I have, indeed, made the mistake of trying. The situation made it abundantly clear that I needed to rethink. A very patient, good-listener friend heard me out on a subject that I'd already talked to death endlessly. After a few moments' silence, she quietly and considerately raised what she called a "confession compulsion." She pointed out that there's a difference between things that need to be confessed—wanting or planning to harm oneself or others—and secrets we want to tell, for attention or commiseration or absolution. There's also a difference between acknowledging one's sins in religious situation, and sharing them to a friend. Some stuff that it's OK and expected to reveal to one's spiritual advisor is not necessary or appropriate to tell someone outside that specific realm, a family member or friend. Why? Because they will have to live with it, too. With the weight of whatever's already weighing on you. With your sadness or fear or TMI.
6 Do you think you have much impact on the lives of people whose paths you cross?
we cross paths with innumerable people without having a moments' impact on each other. Not just when literally passing by, but also in meaningless, impersonal ways that don't rise to the level of conscious interaction. It's that action and reaction that create 'impact'.
My impact is pretty limited. I focus on the people I care about, to the extent possible. Part of being an introvert in the way that I am is that I've got a limited amount of "me" to go around, and I don't want to run out by wasting it.
7 Can you be counted on to do what you say you'll do?
yeah, I'm generally reliable. I am (mostly) comfortable with saying no to stuff I don't want to do.
[from The Book of Questions; the title quotation is by Patrick Rothfuss, The Wise Man's Fear]
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