what if you got all your whys answered? Would you be satisfied then?

1. Have you ever had a work-related dream or nightmare? 

    all. the. time. That's how my work stress keeps itself at a minimum--by playing out in my dreams. Some of the recent ones:

    * getting in trouble with a temporary supervisor for engaging in Teams chats outside those he created, and being screamed at (in chat form) by him that my regular boss (Lord Farquaad) and I are "bad communicators"

    * attending a conference which seemed to involve nothing except my three regular coworkers (Blackbeard the pirate, Lord F., and the gentle monkey) and me getting together in a vast conference room filled with round tables, but each of us just sitting on the floor in our own corner of the room, doing our own thing. We'd each brought one of our hobbies along, and were just quietly playing by ourselves. Each evening, we'd get together at the hotel's nice restaurant for a few drinks and a fun meal. The next day, we'd do it all over again. 

    * just working in my dream, knowing that I'm not supposed to be working outside of work hours or over my state cap of hours but doing it anyway, even sometimes knowing I'm sleeping but not being able to stop. It's not a nightmare, but it's also not the most relaxing sleep. 

 

4. What is something that you find completely adorable? 

Mr. Matt McCarthy

    Mr. Matt McCarthy's surreal cat art. I recently acquired one of his micro cat prints, and I'm in love. I've followed him on IG for ages. He seems like the kind of person I'd like to know in real life. His art is surprising, sometimes funny, and often soothing in a way that is hard to describe and wonderful to feel. 

 

3. If you could change one thing about your workplace, what would it be? 

    the need to work with certain people. Every job has its social incompatibilities, and the funky communication needs and patterns of remote work seems to make it even harder to get along sometimes. 

 

5. What is the craziest thing you have ever done to attract someone’s attention? 

    at the time I suppose it didn't seem crazy.... 

    I left a party in the dead of winter during a snowstorm wearing a shirt and jeans under a normal coat, but in only my infamous Eastland boat shoes and no socks. I followed a guy who was both attractive and infuriating from the party to his house, arguing and kicking snow at him. 

    He's still infuriating (and attractive) but in the intervening years we've learned to channel all that into what is prehaps one of the finest friendships ever to develop.  

 

6. Which family event would you love to relive? 

    my wedding. I'd love to be able to go back to that day and actually enjoy it all—but from the outside looking in rather than as the focus of attention. It's the last time I would see some of those people, and I'd do it in an instant if I could.

 

7. Which of your current (or most recent) significant other's friends do you find most attractive? 

     a big, blond, pink-cheeked farmer. He's very handsome, kind, and interested in me as a person. If things had been different, he and I might have made a pretty good couple.

 

8. Who in your office would survive a zombie apocalypse and why? 

     Blackbeard, for sure. He's not a "prepper" or a weapons nut, but he's more ready than most people for whatever might come busting through the door. If I were choosing sides, he would definitely be my first pick for anything hand-to-hand or survivalist. 

 

[from here, divided and adapted; the title quotation is from Jayant Chopra]