shadow post

    Sorry for the silence. I've been out of it for a while. Not feeling well (walloped by a cold over the last couple of days, after probably a month of too little sleep), exhausted besides (work is...unreal), always cold (I think I've got three frostbitten toes, which almost never feel warm), and struggling with technology. And I discovered last night that one of my friends is a lot less reliable than previously thought, which sucks.

    Anyway, all this is just to excuse another day of no writing. There will be something real coming within the next day or two. Promise.

it's not the cold, it's the dry

• Crabby.
• One reason: it's been crazy-cold pretty much since I've been back from the home state. I don't remember the last time my feet were warm. This sucks.
• Thank God for Facebook. A friend who lives in the next state over to the east updated his status this afternoon, something about the upcoming blizzard and his dread of uncovering his car from beneath the snow. I knew that snow was predicted for this area, but I hadn't realized that the 'b' word had been mentioned. Here's the latest from the National Weather Service: "... WINTER STORM WATCH REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM WEDNESDAY EVENING THROUGH LATE THURSDAY NIGHT...
  A WINTER STORM WATCH REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM WEDNESDAY EVENING THROUGH LATE THURSDAY NIGHT.
  * TIMING... SNOW WILL OVERSPREAD NORTH CENTRAL [this state] WEDNESDAY EVENING AND THE REMAINDER OF NORTHEAST [state] INTO NORTHWEST [friend's state] LATE WEDNESDAY NIGHT INTO EARLY THURSDAY MORNING. SNOW IS EXPECTED TO BEGIN TO TAPER OFF THURSDAY NIGHT WITH THE EXCEPTION ACROSS PORTIONS OF NORTHEAST [my state] AND NORTHWEST [his state] WHICH MAY RECEIVE ADDITIONAL SNOW ACCUMULATIONS FROM LAKE EFFECT SNOW.
  * ACCUMULATIONS... 6 TO 9 INCHES OF SNOW ACCUMULATION BY LATE THURSDAY NIGHT WITH LOCALLY HIGHER ACCUMULATIONS POSSIBLE FOR AREAS WHICH RECEIVE ADDITIONAL LAKE EFFECT SNOW ACCUMULATIONS THURSDAY NIGHT."
  Oh, blargh. But at least I'm prepared, which I would not have been had it not been for my friend's status
• Valentine's Day is coming up, right? Add this to my list: the Romana Necklace (from Sundance) No, I haven't any idea where I'd wear it, or with what. I just love it.
• One of my friends is suddenly very ill. Very distressingly, very suddenly, very, very sick. That SUCKS.
• No, commenting is still not up. No, JS-Kit is still not offering any assistance. Yes, I have contacted them directly. (After having trolled through their "help" forums--which are really just customers bitching about Haloscan biting the dust--for several hours.) At this point I'm fairly certain that what comments I had are completely gone. If that is the case, I will get a refund, buy a domain, and move the blog. This blows. (I realize that it's not Blogger's fault, exactly, but it sort of is. If their setup was not incompatible with pretty much everything else out there, then this would not have been necessary.)
• Time for bed. g'night!

yes we love them, man

    Theoretically, if you didn't want to know someone better, why would you become friends with them on Facebook? Especially if you have only 45 other friends, so "friend" has actual meaning? 

    This song is running through my head. It's a quirky mix of 50s jivey rock and modern pop, swing, reggae, and beach music. The best song of the new CD by far. Enjoy... [link died]

["Girls Were Made to Love" by Sugar Ray feat. Collie Buddz, from Music for Cougars]

full of illusions, but otherwise accurate

Your Favorite Color is Blue

You are a compassionate, empathetic, and sensitive person. You can truly put yourself in someone else's shoes. You're known to be very soothing and understanding. Your friends can always turn to you in times of need. You see the world realistically. You don't have any illusions about what is or isn't going on. You are wise and thoughtful. You don't rush to judgement, and you think things through.

What's Your Favorite Color?

Blogthings: Our Quizzes Weren't Written By Bored 12 Year Olds

    In commenting news, I'm thinking the incompatibility stems from my stubborn use of the old Blogger template. I HATEHATEHATE the idea of switching up to the new one after all this time (and the struggles I've gone through to retain my design), but seriously, I've already spent the money, so I'll try the switch tonight and we'll see what happens.

massive NYE quiz-a-rama

1. 1. Will you be looking for a new job? Am I ever not?
   2. Will you be looking for a new relationship? Er, maybe?
   3. New house? Yup
   4. What will you do differently in '10? In all seriousness, I'm trying to write better. I mean, my handwriting has become really atrocious, and I'm trying to clean it up. It's not a resolution, really, but just the continual improvement plan.
   5. New Year's resolution? Erk. Not reading ahead, obviously. I try not to do resolutions.
   6. What will you not be doing in '10? Paying student loans! Woohoo!
   7. Any trips planned? I'm receiving, not sending, thus far. I have the feeling that I might make it out to NY (and if I do, I'm SO going to Montgomery!), and maybe OK...unless I can convince Heidi to meet me in Miami!
   8. Wedding plans? There are no weddings on the horizon of which I am currently aware.
   9. What's on your calendar? Shopping tomorrow with Shoe. Haircut appointment on Friday. Something with the Cat & the artcat during January.
   10. What can't you wait for? Friday, for different reasons.
   11. What would you like to see happen differently? I'd love to see work begin an hour or two later in the morning. Seems unlikely.
   12. What about yourself will you be changing? Clothes.
   13. What happened in '09 that you didn't think would ever happen? Paying off those student loans.
   14. Will you be nicer to the people you care about? No, I plan to punch them in the face each time I see them. Duh?
   15. Will you dress differently this year than you did in '09? Yup. I'm sneaking away from the uniform.
   16. Will you start or quit drinking? I plan to drink excessively.
   17. Will you better your relationship with your family? Despite a campaign from someone with whom I share space in the employment zone - no, probably not. I'm good with those that matter, and those that don't, do not.
   18. Will you do charity work? Unlikely.
   19. Will you go to bars? Yes, and I will drag yon Cat with me. hee hee hee
   20. Will you be nice to people you don't know? Doesn't sound much like me, either. Hmm.
   21. Do you expect '10 to be a good year for you? Yes. Always the optimist. Har!
   22. How much did you change from this time last year til now? I'm not sure it can be expressed quantitatively. I feel immeasurably different.
   23. Do you plan on having a child? Considering recent conversations: HA! Not if I can help it, and if I do, at least three people will NEVER know it.
   24. Will you still be friends with the same people you are friends with now? Yes, and then some.
   25. Major lifestyle changes? probably not.
   26. Will you be moving? Is this different from "new house"?
   27. What will you make sure doesn't happen in '10 that happened in '09? certain specific past mistakes
   28. What are your New Years Eve plans? I stayed home, relaxed, and got some good sleep. It was fine.
   29. Will you have someone to kiss at midnight? I could've, but didn't. S'not so bad.
   30. One wish for '10? A chance to find out a few more of the answers.
2. 1. What was the single best thing that happened this past year? yeah, I'm gonna have to go with those loans again.
   2. What was the most challenging thing that happened? Texas, in all its wonderful and irritating complications
   3. What was an unexpected joy this past year? visits from Heidi; reconnecting and making new friends on FB; flowers on my birthday
   4. What was an unexpected obstacle? ex-friends and equine spouses of others
   5. Pick three words to describe 2009: "November was wack"
   6. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe your 2009 (don’t ask them; guess based on how you think your spouse sees you): wow, that's discriminatory, isn't it?
   7. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe their 2009 (again, without asking): since I haven't a spouse: grrr
   8. What were the best books you read this year? Hang the DJ: An Alternative Book of Music Lists, Dearest Creature, and Nothing but a Smile
   9. With whom were your most valuable relationships? Fluffy, college BFF, the Cat, Heidi, and a fellow who ought to remain nameless
   10. What was your biggest personal change from January to December of this past year? considerably fewer UPS deliveries
   11. In what way(s) did you grow emotionally? more time spent alone, better
   12. In what way(s) did you grow spiritually? less time spent picking myself apart for things that are greater than me
   13. In what way(s) did you grow physically? it wasn't exactly "growth"--I lost some weight in my ass and now my pants don't fit like they used to
   14. In what way(s) did you grow in your relationships with others? more listening, less judging - but also more offering, of help or affection or whatever seemed needed
   15. What was the most enjoyable area of managing your home? acquiring a new, non-smoking computer
   16. What was your most challenging area of home management? waiting to buy the new computer, and doing without a camera for the whole year
   17. What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year? sleep. If only I could figure out a viable alternative....
   18. What was the best way you used your time this past year? writing in my journal. I'm always amazed, when I've stopped for a while, how utterly vital it seems once I've begun again.
   19. What was the biggest thing you learned this past year? that some people are, far from being "less than you'd thought they were," utterly beneath contempt. I wish I could wish her away, not only from myself (in my personal history) but from the people she pretends to care about.
   20. Create a phrase or statement that describes 2009 for you: "whatever we are, we are"
3. 1. Three things that have changed since the beginning of the year: oh, during 2009? attitude toward work, relationship with delivery guy, and perspective re: some people who are acquaintances but not friends
   2. Three things that didn’t change: affection for the Lickster (mostly brotherly), taste in music (still all over the map), and need for a new camera
   3. Three things you want to change next year: tattoo #3 (and then some), use of passport, and reallocation of mental powers
4. • In 2009, I gained: money, ironically
   • I lost: weight in my butt
   • I stopped: even trying to get to work on time
   • I started: corresponding with someone who's become...well, like a brother, but somehow more, too
   • I was hugely satisfied by:smiles on the faces of friends
   • And frustrated by: actions taken by people I thought were, if not to me, sort of objectively decent, but who I now know to be far less than they pretend to be
   • I am so embarrassed that I: stopped walking with the walking buddies when I was sick in July and never started up again
   • Once again, I: found it difficult to resist the siren call of the delivery guy
   • Once again, I did not: hold back from spending a lot of money impulsively, this time on a trip (which I don't regret at all)
   • The biggest physical difference between me last December and this December is: I spent it with my family this year
   • The biggest psychological difference between me last December and this December is: in some ways I was more lonely this year
   • I loved spending time: writing, and reading
   • Why did I spend even two minutes: trying to crochet?!
   • I should have spent more time: tra la la~"should" is not such a welcome word in my vocabulary
   • I regret buying: the carry-on without the other luggage that matches it. The carry-on is fantastic and I wish I'd bought the rest of the set, I mean.
   • I will never regret buying: this computer, or the plane tickets
   • I worried: about being good enough for SCH
   • I didn’t: realize that I'm good enough. Period.
   • My fookin' family just about drove me crazy.
   • The most relaxing place I went was: Cat- and Beastville.
   • Why did I: not try harder to like the other nephew? (Don't worry; I already know the answer to that one.)
   • The best thing I did for someone else was: putting together some music a couple of days before a wedding.
   • The best thing I did for myself was: allocating time and money for monthly massages.
   • The best thing someone did for me was: telling me, seriously, that I write well.
   • The one thing I’d like to do again, but do it better, is: wow the fuck out of the judge at/after/because of/thanks to jury duty.

[from The Cat, of course, who snatched it from kwizgiver]

that's half-dead in dog years

    Today marks year number six of the blog. When's the last time I could say I'd done anything consistently for six years? So. Happy blog-birthday to me.

    It also marks the blog's transition from Haloscan to Echo commenting. It is extraordinarily unclear (a) how to accomplish the transition itself (although making payment was très facile) (b) when that will happen, or (c) what it will mean to those commenting. Bear with me, and if there are problems, email me at the address in the footer of the blog.

    In other news, I seem to have misplaced not one but two credit cards, which were lounging on my desk/file cabinet awaiting filing. Um, fuck?! Could I possibly be more disorganized?! Yes, I will make sure that I find them before I take out the garbage, etc. Duhhhhhhh.

    To catch up on recent activities: yeah, lunch was good. The trip to the home state was not bad, considering the really terrible weather. I outstayed my comfort period, so by the time I left I was twitchy to leave and to get back to living alone again. I know this does not bode well for future domestic entanglements. The trip back was much quieter and less fraught with climactic drama.

    Work is...work. Unhappy (for me) changes in staff, but they were not unexpected. Although it could mean changing my schedule to work the additional 19 hours that my department has lost - some things just won't get done. Oh well.

    [OK, I found both of the cards, after working myself into a full-scale freak-out. One was already further into the to-be-filed queue than I'd realized, and the other was beneath something on the desk that I hadn't realized wasn't there the last time I'd used it. Complicated, confusing, annoying, but when I found it - oh, yeah, of course. And, wow, how could I...? Well, it doesn't matter. Found. *whew*]

    New Years' Eve was surprisingly quiet. I stayed home, took an early nap, didn't drink at all, texted with a female friend, took a long bath, chatted online with a male friend who was ignoring his party guests to talk with me, read and wrote, and went to bed relatively early. It might sound boring, but compared to some more "traditional" New Years Eves lately, I'll take boring, thanks.

    This week, my thoughts will be with G., ending one phase but not the friendships that have begun from it; and Sam, returning to Wales for part II of her adventure; and a friend undergoing medical work. Timely reminders to be good to those who are good to us, right? Hugs to all y'all.