abstain from murder, theft, fornication, perjury, blasphemy, and disrespect

1 Would you like to have a high-definition nude image of yourself in your physical prime? 

    absolutely

 

2 In what period since you were a teenager did you have the most personal growth and change? 

    the four years around the divorce. Physically, emotionally, practically, sexually, financially, socially, professionally....

    If you wanted to have another such period, what could you do to bring it about or otherwise shake up your life? 

    good question, since that span of time and change was hardly part of some master plan. I suppose I'd need to stick a fork in my primary social relationship, destroy my parents' faith, alienate a bunch of friends (or, to be fair, people I thought were my friends), take a new job, move house at least 3 times, spontaneously become involved with someone 8 years and a million miles from my emotional location, lose roughly 1/4 of my body weight, annihilate my financial security, and make a bunch of foolish, short term choices with long-term effects.

 

3 What are the most important things (excluding children) you've brought into the world that would not exist without you? 

    21+ years of this blog, a handful of other writing, and some old-style mix CDs

 

4 Would you commit perjury for a close friend? For example, might you testify that your best friend was driving carefully when he hit a pedestrian even though he actually was laughing at something on the radio and not paying attention? 

    yes, but not for something that blatantly dumb. Those for whom I can imagine doing such a thing are grown-ups who wouldn't fuck up that badly and expect someone else to pull their bacon out of the fire. 

    To be fair, there's really only one person for whom this could become realistic, and I've already lied for them a thousand times before. What's one more?

 

 [from The Book of Questions; the title quotation is by Bertrand Russell, and reads in its entirety as follows.]

If throughout your life you abstain from murder, theft, fornication, perjury, blasphemy, and disrespect toward your parents, church, and your king, you are conventionally held to deserve moral admiration even if you have never done a single kind, generous or useful action. This very inadequate notion of virtue is an outcome of taboo morality, and has done untold harm.

clumsy eloquence of a body

Now uselessness casts its shadowy ligature 

across If only. Now—never mind how 

briefly—conquest almost seems not to have, 

from the start, been the only color, 

                                                        each defeat 

a stepping-stone across a stream whose 

name, maybe, should have mattered more, 

 

but didn’t. It’s late. It’s dark out. Crush 

of hollyhock and lantana, and flawed 

intention. Bells, as if meant 

                                            to remind us. Clumsy 

eloquence of a body faltering; fumbling rhythmically. 

—Look at me. Little ocean, getting farther away. 

Now I touch at once both everything and nothing. 

 

[Carl Phillips {1959- } 'My Bluest Shirt', from Double Shadow: Poems]

without her, life for him would be something but half-lived

When I feel most authentically myself:

     wandering a bookstore or library; writing for the blog when the words really flow; on a walk with no accompaniment but my thoughts

 

What I'm thankful for today: 

    an incredibly clean living space. My temporary roommate is coming tomorrow—unexpectedly early—and I've scrambled to get ready for them. The place looks amazing.

 

A memory I hope I never forget: 

    my maternal grandmother smiling and waving goodbye, the last time I saw her

 

Ways I connect with long distant friends: 

    text, a little email, and, primarily, actual hand-written letters. That last has fallen off quite a bit over the years, admittedly.

 

How I reconnect with myself when I feel lost: 

    see 'authentically myself', above. Also writing in my journal, baking, watching movies (older than 1960 are best), taking pictures, or playing with a kitty.

 

My signature drink if I owned a café: 

    this is the first prompt in a long time that's left me speechless. I'd never want to run a restaurant, and my taste in café drinks is run of the mill. 

    How about, if I ever owned a bookstore, it would always stock: David James Duncan's The Brothers K; all of Jennifer Crusie's books (particularly the trade paperbacks); all of Rainbow Rowell's books; all of Alisa Kwitney's books for adults; The Silent Miaow by Paul Gallico; and anything I could find on deep-sea diving, grief, the building of the Panama Canal, neutrality in World War II, small-batch cooking or baking, or mysteries based in the northern U.S. states.

 

 [from here, stolen from League of Extraordinary Penpals; the title quotation is by Paul Gallico, from The Lonely]

God bless Mama, Papa, Captain Midnight, Veronica Lake, and the President of the United States

Average rating: 7.75 - yay!

Shadow of a Doubt (1943) - "Young Charlotte 'Charlie' Newton not only shares a name with her favorite uncle, but a special bond. At times, she feels the charming man is the only one who understands her need to be extraordinary, and that she is better than her tiny hometown. So when life is too dull, she invites him to visit. But two detectives also arrive in town, and a series of unusual clues concerning the mysterious 'Merry Widow Murderer' seem to change Uncle Charlie's behavior. Young Charlie starts to suspect that the man she once idolized is not what he seems, and as her world shatters she realizes that her life might be in danger."
length: 1 hour, 48 minutes

source: I borrowed the DVD through the public library
I watched it because: it was recommended on a film noir best list
IMDB: 7.8/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 100% Audience: 89%
my IMDB: 7/10

MPAA rating: PG

notable quote: "Go away, I'm warning you. Go away or I'll kill you myself. See... that's the way I feel about you."

directed by: Alfred Hitchcock

my notes: menacing, ominous, a little funny, and well done. I especially liked Macdonald Carey as Detective Jack Graham.

Academy Award nominee: Best Writing, Original Story—Gordon McDonell
overall:  recommended

The Shawshank Redemption (1994) - "Andy Dufresne is a young, successful banker, wrongfully convicted of the murder of his wife and her lover, despite maintaining his innocence. Sentenced to life in Shawshank State Penitentiary, a harsh and unforgiving prison, Andy must navigate the brutal realities of life behind bars. He encounters a colorful cast of inmates, including Red, an experienced and wise long-term prisoner. As Andy adjusts to prison life, he faces unimaginable challenges and experiences the cruelty of corrupt prison guards and the oppressive nature of the system. However, his unyielding resilience and quiet determination shine through, gradually earning him respect and admiration among his fellow inmates."

length: 2 hours, 22 minutes

source: I own the DVD
I watched it because: it's been too long since I've seen it, and I was looking for something heartwarming
IMDB: 9.3/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 89% Audience: 98%
my IMDB: 10/10

AFI: 100 Years…100 Cheers (2006) #23

    100 Years…100 Movies - 10th anniversary edition (2007) #72

MPAA rating: R

notable quote: "Bad luck, I guess. It floats around. It's got to land on somebody. It was my turn, that's all. I was in the path of the tornado. I just didn't expect the storm would last as long as it has."

directed by: Frank Darabont

my notes: a wonderful story, brilliantly told. I admire everything about this movie. I even love the law parts, which are surprisingly and completely correct, and this film includes some excellent estate planning advice. That's entertainment!

Academy Award nominee:
• Best Picture—Niki Marvin

• Best Actor—Morgan Freeman

• Best Writing, Screenplay based on material previously produced or published—Frank Darabont

• Best Cinematography—Roger Deakins

• Best Sound—Robert J Litt, Elliot Tyson, Michael Herbick, Willie D Burton

• Best Film Editing—Richard Francis-Bruce

• Best Music, Original score—Thomas Newman
overall: most highly recommended

Black Mask (1996) - "Simon appears to be a mild-mannered librarian, but he's actually a genetically enhanced solider who feels no pain. His team of super-soldiers, code-named Squad 701, was disbanded after some of them had psychotic episodes and exhibited mental instability. Simon thinks his fighting days are behind him, but when members of the squad, led by his ex-commander, Hung, start murdering drug dealers, Simon dons a black mask and searches the streets for his former comrades."
length: 1 hour, 39 minutes

source: I own the DVD (also reviewed here)
I watched it because: it came up in the rotation of my favorite martial arts films
IMDB: 6.0/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 50% Audience: 50%
my IMDB: 8/10

notable quote: "Stop talking and just kick the motherfucker's ass, would you?"

MPAA rating: R

directed by: Daniel Lee

my notes: it's a little silly, unreal, and totally wonderful. Jet Li as a librarian... sigh.

overall:  recommended

Dr. No (1962) - "In the film that launched the James Bond saga, Agent 007 (Sean Connery) battles mysterious Dr. No, a scientific genius bent on destroying the U.S. space program. As the countdown to disaster begins, Bond must go to Jamaica, where he encounters beautiful Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress), to confront a megalomaniacal villain in his massive island headquarters."
length: 1 hour, 50 minutes

source: streamed
I watched it because: I find Sean Connery hard to resist. Has there ever been a more handsome man? I doubt it.
IMDB: 7.2/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 95% Audience: 82%
my IMDB: 6/10

notable quote: "'Moneypenny! What gives?'

    'Me, given an ounce of encouragement. You've never taken me to dinner looking like this. You've never taken me to dinner...'

    'I would, you know—only "M" would have me court-martialed for ... illegal use of government property.'

    'Flattery will get you nowhere—but don't stop trying.'"

MPAA rating: PG

directed by: Terence Young

my notes: dumb story, beautiful, and classic.

overall: mildly recommended

 

[the title quotation is from Shadow of a Doubt]

once upon a time there was a hazel-eyed boy with dimples

Do you take care of yourself outwardly—bathing, shaving, mode of dress, etc.—the same way when your significant other is not around? 

    this one made me snort aloud. Indeed, I do not bathe, shave, or dress for a significant other. Like any normal person, I will "dress up" when I have special plans, but that involves family and friends across the board. My phase of living partner-specific is in the past.

 

What is your most ticklish spot? 

    ribs, around the spot where my elbows naturally rest. I'm pretty ticklish all over, though, so keep away.

 

Are you self-conscious about any part of your body? 

    it would be faster and easier to name those parts that don't make me cringe or squirm or roll my eyes

 

Is there any time you've felt vulnerable during sex? 

    I don't recall the precise date and time, but....

    Yes, and I would be surprised if any hetero female hasn't felt that way at least once, if not all the time. There is a certain degree of physical vulnerability in the very nature of the act. That can be heightened or ameliorated by the relationship and behavior between the partners.

 

Do you have any sexual regrets? 

    is this a joke?

 

Have you ever told a complete stranger something that you've held back from a lover?      

    not a complete stranger, but someone I don't know very well and whose life only intercepts mine in a certain way—like a blog reader, for instance, or someone I meet at a professional conference—might hear more and different content than would my day-to-day friends, much less a partner. It's like having a therapist and not even having to pay for it, and no motivation for either to tell anyone else the specifics.

    I have a friend from work, a guy, someone I've never met face to face (and likely will not). We chat on Teams nearly all day long, every work day. In the past year, each of us have shared stuff that we've never told another living soul. Is it because we're closer than any other relationship in our lives? Or is it because we are friends, trust each other (because of the nature of the job, if for no other reason), and also protected by the fact that we are not in each others' lives in any other way? Probably so.  

 

Have you ever had a one-night stand? 

    Yes.

 

Have you ever rebounded and known you were doing so?

    the only time I really knew it was after my husband and I separated and the divorce was in process. I also failed at that, because the rebound was Nick and the process took 3 flippin years. 

 

How did you first learn about sex?   

    overhearing bragging boys' and giggling girls' chatter, TV and movies, books (especially books), trial and error, rumor, gossip, and practice practice practice

 

Who did you lose your virginity to? 

    I don't like this phrase. Why is it termed a loss?

    The first person with whom I had this experience was a kid (we were both kids) sort of from the neighborhood. We dated for a while beforehand, though not nearly long enough to actually know each other well. I wish I'd saved that honor, such as it is, for the next kid that came along, if not for someone I actually cared about. 

 

What is your aphrodisiac of choice? 

    focused conversation

 

Would you consider piercing a part of your body besides your ears? 

    I very, very briefly considered piercing my navel but ultimately realized that I'd rip the thing out in no time. Even ears are a dangerous spot sometimes.

 

Which body part would you like a partner to have pierced? 

    I'm not disturbed by guys' piercings—I was married to someone with a hole or two in his ears, after all—but it's not a feature I'd seek out. There is also at least one spot that I can think of that would be an immediate, vehement deal-breaker. 

 

Would you ever tattoo a partner's name on the place they love best? 

    ha! No. It seems like tapping on the door of the universe and asking for it all to go kablooie. Is this a hint that I don't believe in "forever"?

 

What is your favorite article of clothing that a partner has worn? 

    a dark green button-up shirt, which had a terrific texture, fit perfectly, and brought out something spectacular in their eyes

 

[pulled and adapted from 269 Red Hot XXX-Rated Questions; the title quotation is by Angie Thomas, from a novel called "The Hate U Give", which I have never read—and likely would not, with a title like that]

at the edge of sweet sanity open such wild, blind wings

All summer 

I wandered the fields 

that were thickening 

every morning, 

 

every rainfall, 

with weeds and blossoms, 

with the long loops 

of the shimmering, and the extravagant— 

 

pale as flames they rose 

and fell back, 

replete and beautiful— 

that was all there was— 

 

 

and I too 

once or twice, at least, 

felt myself rising, 

my boots 

 

touching suddenly the tops of the weeds, 

the blue and silky air— 

listen, 

passion did it, 

 

called me forth, 

addled me, 

stripped me clean 

then covered me with the cloth of happiness— 

 

I think there is no other prize, 

only rapture the gleaming, 

rapture the illogical the weightless— 

 

whether it be for the perfect shapeliness 

of something you love— 

like an old German song— 

or of someone— 

 

or the dark floss of the earth itself, 

heavy and electric. 

At the edge of sweet sanity open 

such wild, blind wings. 

 

[Mary Oliver {1935-2019} 'The Rapture', from West Wind]

any woman is just as capable of being a hero as any man

1. I am looking forward to ... 

    spring. As I write this, only 72 more days (via DaysTo). I'm motivated because it's 9º, feels like -2º: bright, sunny, slight breeze, and cold as fuck.

 

2. Least favorite words 

    • troubleshoot

    • "adulting" (anyone who uses it ought to be punched in the kidneys)

    • influencer

    • really (this is one of my bad habits)

    • trigger

    • iconic

    • GOAT

 

3. If I ruled the world ...

    internet access would be a public utility, cost-capped and with uniform quality.

    Or maybe a global moratorium on glitter. It makes me seethe to find it all over my house after innocently opening a holiday card or gift.

4. Favorite websites and blogs 

    • Worldcat.org—a database of library materials, worldwide, helpful both in identifying stuff I've read for the poetry posts and when seeking out new books (of any kind) to try

    • imdb.com—invaluable, with all the movies I watch, to weed out (some of) the bad ones and to find (good) suggestions for new ones

    • sundaystealing.blogspot.com—a source for questions memes (there's a post on this general topic in the hopper)

 

5. Things I do for myself 

    pedicures, cooking, and refilling washer fluid

6. Weekly rituals 

    outside the sorts of things that everyone does...

    deep-conditioner, refill vitamin containers, and stock work-area supplies (scratch paper, hand lotion, tissues, eye drops, etc.)

 

7. DIYs I want to try 

    I'm not a big DIY'er, since my thumbs are both weakened by tendonitis and my eyes don't like to work together; all that makes it more difficult than fun. The one exception, though, is constructing an alternative Christmas tree with my dad every couple of years. We look around online now and then, trying to hit on something cool that's not unreasonably complex or time-consuming and that can be displayed and stored in a small space. Below are three potential options for upcoming construction periods...

8. On my shopping list 

    • round roast for the crock pot (plus onions, carrots and golden potatoes)

    • Cheerios (because it's all I have for breakfast)

    • Freschetta rising-crust four-cheese pizza (to which I add various ingredients depending on current preference)

    • apples (Gala)

    • granola bars

    • chicken breasts for the crock pot (next-up recipe: ranch chicken)

    • hair clips (because my hair is too long for the small ones but not long enough and too soft for the medium ones so I use the small but break them all the time)

 

[taken {and adapted} from here; the title quotation is from Hayao Miyazaki]

naked as newts

That long ago we drove ourselves 

To the thermal pool and floated hours 

In its uterine calm, naked as newts; 

Then hauled our sapped bliss back uphill 

To the cheap hotel; and on a bed 

That had plainly borne the labors of love 

For at least three generations of roamers, 

We faced the choice of using the rest 

Of our new lulled ease in joining our selves 

In a trial knot of mutual skin— 

Our excellent hides that were each then fine 

As rawhide gets. 

                                The trial worked, 

Then worked (with frequent repeats and variants— 

Newfound knots as brilliant as any 

Known to an eagle scout) for the years 

Till I was effectively sheared off smooth 

Below the waist. 

                                Nine years of bearing that 

With no loud grumble; and here again 

You volunteer what we have left— 

Your same hide, seasoned a little but still 

As fine as a well-made glove containing 

A trusty hand dispensing grace. 

        I take it, new as a playground boy 

Confronted with the actual dream 

Of proffered skin, and offer it 

What I have now, the parts that work. 

They prove sufficient; you bloom on schedule, 

Old faithful mate. 

                                Weeks later, basking, 

I feel stripped clean still; in service again, 

A scow called back from years in mothballs— 

Eager to tow, dredge, breast high seas 

If that brief duty bears you on 

As it does me. 

 

[Reynolds Price {1933-2011} 'Twenty-One Years', from The Best American Poetry 1996, edited by Adrienne Rich]

human beings are so capricious, so complex, so delightfully contradictory, that they deserve not only our consideration, but our reconsideration—and our unwavering determination to withhold our opinion until we have engaged with them in every possible setting at every possible hour

Are you a fan of romantic gestures? 

    romantic gestures, Hell yes. Grand gestures, not at all. It's a complicated equation, and I've written about it a few times (from different perspectives) in the last 21 years. See, e.g.: here and here. Sure, I'd like to know that a romantic partner is so moved by their feelings that they express them boldly. I'd love to look out some morning and see flowers outside my window, and know who'd orchestrated the moment—and why. But I am repulsed by public, extravagant proposals, for instance. To know me, and love me, would mean understanding that I am essentially a private person. Those showy events make me cringe.

 

Do you believe in second chances after bad first impressions? 

    within reason, yeah. Everyone has a bad day now and then, and the rest of our lives ought not to hinge on truly now-and-then attitudes and behavior. That being said, sometimes a bad first impression is accurate!

Have many times have you been in love? 

    I think that when a relationship ends, there is a natural and partially willful amnesia about the beloved and your time together. For the sake of sanity, it's hard to recall them "accurately" (as if feelings can be "accurate" at all). Sometimes, the result is to over-romanticize the relationship (anyone still reading who lived through my Johnnie Walker phase?) and other times it's a necessary and complete revulsion (Rowdy, Toby, et. al). 

    With this caveat: I've been in love a handful of times before.

 

Have you ever had a run-in with the law? 

    three times. Twice resulting in a verbal warning and once a written warning.

 

How do you feel about prenups? 

    revolted but reluctantly accepting that they are occasionally necessary

 

If you could erase an ex from your memory, would you? 

    yup

 

Tell about something that turns you on—emotionally, personally, intellectually, physically...

    focused attention. It's up to you to decide which of the list of adverbs that addresses!

What are your rules for a long distance relationship? 

    rules??

    There are good long-distance relationships and bad ones, the pointless and the strong, the reciprocated and the terribly one-sided, joyful and sad, on and on. I'm not sure it's the long-distance-ness of them that makes the difference, but the individuals involved and their unique and mutual decency. What works is the partners having roughly equivalent desires and capacity for commitment, communication, independence, and fidelity. 

    Huh, that sounds like what works in a near-distance relationship, too. How extraordinary!

 

What is your grossest habit? 

    telling too much truth

 

What's one movie you're embarrassed to admit you enjoy? 

    nothing that makes a person happy (well, almost nothing) ought to be considered embarrassing. Life is too short to be wasted feeling sheepish about your own joy.

    Anyway, different movies and genres are good for their own purposes. A documentary about an aircraft carrier serves one interest, and an ultra-violent martial arts revenge another. Holiday comedy appeals every now and then, while twisty political thrillers might be more generally good. Deeply intellectual and/or philosophical pictures are sometimes awesome, and films about dancing or cooking or baseball have their space, too. I am embarrassed by none of it.

 

What's the worst advice you've ever given? 

    "try not to think about it", "try not to worry", or "let it go." Undeniably illogical, meaningless, and unhelpful. 

 

 [adapted from here; the title quotation is by Amor Towles, from A Gentleman in Moscow]

thank God, I'm glad I weren't on fire—I would've burned to death before you got one button undone

Average rating: 7, from four very different sorts of movies.

Mystery, Alaska (1999) - "A publicity stunt turns into the ultimate lopsided competition, when the world famous New York Rangers face off against the team from Mystery, Alaska—a hockey-loving town of only 633 people. Team Mystery is a rag-tag collection of eccentric locals including the town's sheriff, its grocer, a deliveryman and a high school senior who play for the love of the game, not fame or big money."
length: 1 hour, 59 minutes

source: I own the DVD
I watched it because: I was working on something dead-boring and wanted a movie that I could focus on instead (also reviewed here and here)
IMDB: 6.7/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 37% Audience: 66%
my IMDB: 8/10

notable quote: "If nothing else, it's good for morale."

MPAA rating: R

directed by: Jay Roach

my notes: charming, funny, and incredibly sweet - I love this one. Russell Crowe is terrific, Mary McCormack is wonderful, and this time around I was particularly taken by Lolita Davidovich as the mayor's wife.

overall: highly recommended

Sweet Smell of Success (1957) - "New York City newspaper writer J.J. Hunsecker (Burt Lancaster) holds considerable sway over public opinion with his Broadway column, but one thing that he can't control is his younger sister, Susan (Susan Harrison), who is in a relationship with aspiring jazz guitarist Steve Dallas (Marty Milner). Hunsecker strongly disproves of the romance and recruits publicist Sidney Falco (Tony Curtis) to find a way to split the couple, no matter how ruthless the method."

length: 1 hour, 36 minutes

source: I borrowed the DVD through the public library
I watched it because: it got great reviews
IMDB: 8.0/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 98% Audience: 91%
my IMDB: 5/10

AFI: 100 Years … 100 Heroes and Villains (2003) Villain #35

MPAA rating: Approved

notable quote: "I want that boy taken apart."

directed by: Alexander Mackendrick

my notes: massively overplayed. Horribly, scene-chewingly overplayed. Tony Curtis was no great thespian anyway, but Lancaster is usually better than this. The script blows ("Susie ... Susie ... Susie" - it's "oh Mortimer" all over again) and the music, oddly, doesn't quite match the action. 

    It's a good story, but I did not like the movie. I can't say that it's bad, exactly, but it was not for me.

overall:  recommended for people who might disagree

The Last Picture Show (1971) - "High school seniors and best friends, Sonny and Duane, live in a dying Texas town. The handsome Duane is dating local beauty, Jacy, while Sonny is having an affair with the coach's wife, Ruth. As graduation nears, both boys contemplate their futures. While Duane eyes the Army and Sonny takes over a local business, each boy struggles to figure out if he can escape this dead-end town and build a better life somewhere else."
length: 1 hour, 58 minutes

source: I borrowed the DVD through the public library
I watched it because: I had seen it a really long time ago (October 2006?), it stuck deep in my mind, and it crossed my path again
IMDB: 8.0/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 98% Audience: 89%
my IMDB: 9/10

AFI: 100 Years…100 Movies - 10th anniversary edition (2007) #95

notable quote: "'Is being married always so miserable?'

    'No. Not really. About 80 percent of the time, I guess.'"

MPAA rating: R

directed by: Peter Bogdanovich

my notes: different from anything else I've ever seen. Cloris Leachman (Ruth Popper) is outstanding. Ben Johnson (Sam the Lion), in only a few scenes, is unforgettable. I could not be less surprised that those two won the Oscars, and they are a credit to the Award. Clu Gulager (Abilene) is also marvelous. And Timothy Bottoms (Sonny) is the emotional heart of the film. 

    It's beautifully shot, and has gives the desolate and stark impression of a movie like Hud (1963, reviewed here) thanks to the choice to film in black and white, rare by the 1970s. I'm not a huge fan of this director, who stamps what he does with his own "vision" (as do they all) in a heavy-handed and needlessly quirky way. In any case, it's a good one, and worth seeing.

Academy Award winner:
• Best Supporting Actor—Johnson

• Best Supporting Actress—Leachman
Academy Award nominee:
• Best Picture—Stephen J. Friedman

• Best Supporting Actor—Jeff Bridges

• Best Supporting Actress—Ellen Burstyn

• Best Director—Bogdanovich

• Best Writing, Screenplay based on material from another medium—Larry McMurtry, Bogdanovich

• Best Cinematography—Robert Surtees
overall: highly recommended

A Night at the Opera (1935) - "The Marx Brothers run amuck in the world of opera when Otis B. Driftwood (Groucho Marx) meets aspiring singer Ricardo (Allan Jones), who is determined to win the love of fellow performer Rosa (Kitty Carlisle). Aided by Fiorello (Chico Marx) and Tomasso (Harpo Marx), Otis attempts to unite the young couple, but faces opposition from the preening star Lassparri (Walter Woolf King), who also has his sights on Rosa. Traveling from Italy to New York, Otis and friends rally to try and win the day."
length: 1 hour, 36 minutes

source: I borrowed the DVD through the public library
I watched it because: I was looking for comedies, last time I placed holds, and realized this is one Marx Brothers film I have not seen
IMDB: 7.8/10  -  Rotten Tomatoes: Tomatometer: 97% Audience: 90%
my IMDB: 6/10

AFI: 100 Years…100 Laughs (2000) #12

    100 Years…100 Movies - 10th anniversary edition (2007) #85

MPAA rating: Approved

notable quote: "'Do they allow tipping on the boat?'

    'Yes, sir.'

    'Have you got two fives?'

    'Yes, sir!'

    'Well, then you won't need the ten cents I was gonna give you.'"

directed by: Sam Wood, Edmund Goulding

my notes: typical for the Marx Brothers, this is complete mayhem tied together with a terribly sketchy, dumb plot and, this time, a whole lotta opera singing. If you dig opera, then this is the movie for you. If not, well.... As with Groucho, a little of that genre goes way too far. 

    The high points: Allan Jones as the lovelorn Ricardo, and of course Harpo, the underrated musical genius. (See this review of Cocoanuts, 1929, for more about my love for Harpo.) Some of his terrific performance from Opera is below.

overall:  recommended

 

[the title quotation is from The Last Picture Show]

a good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving

Lough Swilly, 1 of 3 glacial fjords in Ireland

1. Have you traveled abroad? Where have you been? If you haven't been overseas, which countries would you most like to visit? 

    I have not. The most feasible country would be the maple leaf to the north. However, I would most like to visit the area in and around Ireland and Spain, to see the places I wrote about in my thesis (which, incidentally, I'm thinking about reading for the first time in a long time even though just the thought makes me very nervous.) Berehaven and Lough Swilly (Ireland), for example, and Vigo, Cádiz, and obviously Gibraltar (in or near Spain).

 

2. Where did you go on your last trip? Talk about where you went and what you did. 

    my last trip was to the cornhusker state (and really, that's an excellent motto—both bewildering and intriguing) during the summer of '24. I stayed in the most populous city in the state, which is conveniently located at the extreme eastern edge bordering the hawkeye state. That spot was chosen because it's within 6 hours of my current location by car, has several bookstores, and is a place I'd never been. I stayed in a casino hotel (though I didn't gamble at all). Went to a handful of bookstores, a science museum (worth the trip in itself), had the best steak of my life so far, and stumbled upon a food festival that was surprising and fun. There was also a long walk across a pedestrian bridge (pictured below, right) that spans the state line. I would go back, for sure, if the opportunity arises. 

the river area, looking a bit muddier than when I saw it

3. What is the best place for a vacation in your country?

    it is a good thing and a bad thing that my country is home to many, many vacation options that appeal to various types of vacationers. There really is something for everyone: sports, relaxation, big cities, small towns, wilderness (in a huge variety of forms), learning, partying.... 

    My country has a strange, extreme reputation in other parts of the world. We are said to be stupid, arrogant, venal, violent, frivolous, gluttonous, and many other bad things. Some of that is true, albeit in specific examples rather than broad categories. I've always thought it was shortsighted stereotyping, anyway—in the same way that it's simplistic to think—or to pretend—that all _____ers are just _____. Fill in your own blanks.

    In this big country with so much to do, my preference for a vacation is not going to be like everyone else's, but here it is: Lawrence, Kansas. It's cosmopolitan without feeling crazy busy or over-populated. It's natural, without being "in the country" and lacking amenities. It's quirky. There are lots of bookstores. It's less expensive than some vacation spots, though the university is the town and thus on big sports weekends it can be impossible to find a place to stay or eat.

 

4. What is the longest time you have been away from home? Did you feel homesick? 

    this question confuses and amuses me. What does "away from home" mean when you're an adult? 

at the conference hotel

    I spent a week (5 days) taking a professional course, shortly after I started working the (last) financial services job, plus a day on each end for travel. There have been a couple of (road) trips lasting five days or so, and a handful of stays at my feline BFF's place that were nearly as long.

    Did I feel homesick? The week of classes came at an extremely inopportune time, emotionally and socially, and was suffered rather than enjoyed. I wouldn't have called it "homesick", though—more like "newly in love and lonely for the beloved." Each of those road trips was taken with that person, and I was definitely not homesick! And the latter group is pretty much the happiest and most comfortable I can be. No complaints there. 

 

5. How long should a vacation be? How long does it take you to really relax? 

    at least 3 days, not counting travel days. More or less depending how much there is to do and see, and of course how much money there is to facilitate it all. Any less than that and it's all rush, no relax. 

6. What forms of transportation do you prefer to use when you travel? 

    driving myself, 95% of the time. Then, driving when someone I trust is at the wheel. Then flying. Trains (though that's a sketchy proposition), then buses. Not at all a fan of ride-share. Maybe it's the lawyer in me, but it just seems so unregulated (like driverless cars), and the bad examples are far more bad than the good examples are good. My tendency toward vertigo makes boats unappealing, though I can handle the ones that stay pretty calm or, oddly, those that go really fast. And because I'm a throwback, I quite like taxis.

 

7. How do you choose where to go? Are you inspired by other people's travel stories? Or photos?

Or advertising? 

     as described in #2, above, there is a list of verified and potential destinations within a 6-or-so hour drive from home. Anything beyond that would require a higher degree of scrutiny. Within that list, a decision can be made based on: the available time away; seasonal benefits (e.g. the right weather for great photography) or considerations (e.g. the wrong weather for driving or for outdoor adventures); overlap with other travel interests (a cool exhibit at a museum, or in-person shopping needs); and especially good or bad funding.

    'Inspired' is a stronger term than I would use to describe the feelings I have about others' travel stories or photos. Those I see most often are cruise ships and hockey camps, neither of which appeals. The idea of travel, though, can be spurred by seeing someone else's adventure stories.

    As with the above, advertising is almost never directed toward something I'd actually do or see. High-end hotels, flights to seemingly-random locations, weekend tour packages... none of that is in my realm.  

 

8. What's more important to you when you travel—comfort and relaxation, or stimulating new experiences? 

     comforting and relaxing new experiences that are also stimulating, maybe. For instance, I think bookstores are like home away from home, and they're also exciting and compelling. Same with walking by a river that's new to me, or dining in a restaurant that's unfamiliar, prehaps a new favorite (and maybe just food as fuel 'til the next meal). There's always something to photograph, to try, and to remember fondly afterward. I don't need an agenda or a to-see-and-do list to enjoy a trip. 

 

[stolen from here; the title quotation is from Lao Tzu]

it's never been like that between us

Lately I can't help wanting us 

to be like other people. 

For example, if I were a smoker, 

 

you'd lift a match to the cigarette 

just as I put it between my lips. 

It's never been like that 

 

between us: none of that 

easy chemistry, no quick, half automatic 

flares. Everything between us 

 

had to be learned. 

Saturday finds me brooding 

behind my book, all my fantasies 

 

of seduction run up 

against the rocks. 

Tell me again 

 

why you don't like 

sex in the afternoon? 

No, don't tell me— 

 

I'll never understand you, 

never understand us, America's strangest 

loving couple: they never 

 

drink a bottle of wine together, 

and rarely look at each other. 

Into each other's eyes, I mean. 

 

It's true: never across the dinner table 

does he give her that look, 

the stock-in-trade of husbands 

 

everywhere, the one that says 

he wants to go home to bed. 

And when they get there— 

 

when I get you in my arms 

I turn my face 

to the side so as not 

 

to catch you out, you 

always the last to know 

about your own passion. 

 

[Deborah Garrison {1965- } 'On the Road to Getting You', from A Working Girl Can’t Win]

we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new dark age

I am not: mousey

I hurt: when I am not permitted to communicate

I love: that a friend who had a baby—after years of yearning to be a mother—didn't send photo cards for Christmas, because she realizes how hard that can be on some others.

I hate: feeling jealous

I fear: sketchy electrical systems

I hope: to never again have another political argument

I regret: falling in love

I cry: easily

I care: about some ridiculous things

I always: think about a high school boyfriend when I hear the word "hat"

I long: for things that I cannot have

I listen: to audiobooks, several hours each day

I hide: when I'm feeling wounded

I write: as often as possible, in various ways

I miss: being drunk (but not drinking)

I search: on DuckDuckGo

I learn: every day

I feel: sleepy

I know: that I'm essentially alone in the universe

I want: to be fit and strong

I worry: about the health of people I love

I wish: that I could catch up

I have: more than enough Christmas ornaments

I give: less than I have, but more than I ought

I wait: a fraction of a moment before starting through an intersection after a red light, knowing it might get me rear-ended sometime but that's better than being broadsided

I need: all, or nothing at all

 

[from here; the title quotation is by H.P. Lovecraft from The Call of Cthulhu]