11.27.2005

sleepy musing

2 AM and ...I'm still awake

Spent the last four hours driving around, and aroundandaroundandaround, with a friend. Trying to make sense of her Conundrum (which seems to be receding naturally) and mine (ever-present). Dodging clumps of Weather-Related Crud in the road, all the more ironic due to the thunderstorm through which we drove. All the worse for being in my cute, spry car in which one feels each bump, rather than her lux couch-on-wheels in which one could flatten a Daisy troop without noticing. We took all the usual routes...twice, and then took the unusual routes...twice. No clue how many miles, but my guess is 150.

I feel better. Melancholy, a little sore (my back is barking and my clutch foot is asking, "Why?!"), and sleepy-but-not-tired. I'm very much in the mood for one of those marathon phone calls that I used to have, with that one person with whom I used to have those calls. In the absence of that person, however, I sit at my computer in my dimly-lit apartment and I, for all intents and purposes, talk to myself. About missing that friend of the phone calls. About driving 150 miles to nowhere. About "fixing" my problems by talking about them.

When I got home, there was someone parked rather oddly in the lot. It was one of the guys who works in the business below. They often park here while partaking of the downtown activities since the lot is convenient and uncrowded. It's late, though, and I was a little surprised to see this particular car here. I was even more surprised when I saw him at his car...arguing (?) with someone. Had it just been the guy, getting into his car to leave, I'd have definitely said Hey, but the situation was a bit strange and approaching unnerving at this time of day. I simply walked past without acknowledging and came upstairs. Odd, that.

It's lovely to be awake on this night at 2:13. Quiet. The rain blew out the riffraff so the only cars passing are city cops and county sheriff's deputies, and the occasional drunk. Er, the occasional civilian, driving carefully. I wish I had someone to walk with, because it's nearly 40° and not raining or lightning [much] now.

I guess I'll try to take that mojo with me while I sleep. G'night

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