a gentleman is simply a patient wolf

Today is the day when I can finally say without reservation that I do not now, nor will I ever, understand men. At all.
  • The delivery guy (a.k.a. "Ulysses", a.k.a. "the one who doesn't like to kiss me") is not, after all, married. Yeah, I know: confusing. Apparently he won't get married again, since it didn't work the first time. Well, that might have something to do with the extracurricular activities that he's pursuing!
  • My super-├╝ber-terribly-depressed coworker, who broke up with his girlfriend of about a month and a half on Monday night, seems to have recovered nicely. He texted earlier this evening requesting instructions on (my words) appropriate rebound behavior. Oh, to be young and emotionally pliant again.
  • The guy to whom Ulysses introduced me about a month ago--let's call him Toby--continues to surprise and occasionally dismay. He's a good guy, extraordinarily easy to talk to, remarkably forthright and refreshingly honest. Really, helpfully, startlingly honest. Sometimes distressingly so. The strangest thing is that he's turning out to be more of a friend than anything else--and that this whole situation is causing no end of problems for Ulysses. Lesson: "The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away." [Wilson Mizner]
  • One of my very good friends sees my way through this (whatever 'this' is at the moment) very clearly: he thinks I should start running. Literally. I'm shaking my head and laughing as I write this. I do kind of like the idea, but I want you to not wait by the phone for the news, 'k?
  • Another friend is going through a rough time and recently found a connection, or something, with a quotation that I'd posted on the blog (or on Facebook, I'm not sure which). I did notice that it was one of the more heart-wrenching variety and not the head-scratching philosophical sort, and certainly not the snort-inducing silly type. I am glad that he gets something out of what I post; I hope that as time goes on, what seeks him out is less harrowing.
That may be it; I don't know. It's probably enough for now. I'm worn out. Think I'll spend some undiluted quality time with girls for a while.

[title quotation by Lana Turner]


  1. Toby. {{snerk}} (only the name, not the guy himself)

    Ulysses made me laugh too, but the whole married/not thing...he's an idiot. Really. Good name for him.

    Coulda sworn your last line read "...with the girls..." for awhile and had so many mixed reactions that I had to reread it about 5 times before I got it right.

    WV: disesteg

  2. You may be dead on right about all of this being crazy, but just for fun I thought I'd share a few other's thoughts about completely "crazy" ideas.

    "Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
    -- H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.

    "Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction".
    -- Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872

    "Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy."
    -- Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859.

    "We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
    -- Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

    "There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
    -- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

    "The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C,' the idea must be feasible."
    -- A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)

    We're not all FEDEX or the Beatles, though some of us may be just as crazy in our thinking.

  3. C: Toby doesn't suit him at all (and he'd probably roar with laughter to know that he'd been referred to as such, if he knew he was the topic of conversation, which he doesn't), but it's just too cute under the circumstances.

    Ulysses Poseidon Socrates...he's not. Dumbass.

    The girls and I go everywhere together, but it's not like that.

    R: I love you to pieces. I was wondering if you'd feel motivated to respond to that very obvious taunt. :P

    For your information, earlier today I asked a friend for information on joining her gym, and we also discussed (seriously) the probability of taking a fitness class together. It's a good idea, this "moving" thing. I might not go about it the same way you do, but I'm going to do it.