AN ELUSIVE ESSENTIAL TO SOCIAL SUCCESS
1. ON ACQUIRING A SOCIAL POSITION
A well-made grilled cheese sandwich can open a vista
leading to popularity and the possibilities
for "a good time."
2. ON THE LIFE OF THE PARTY
Where the perfect grilled cheese sandwich is
the successful party is also.
3. THE MARK OF A SOCIAL CLIMBER
When you see a woman in silks and sables
speak to a grilled cheese sandwich as if it were dirt
you may be sure she hasn't come far
from the ground herself.
4. ON FRESHNESS
"Keep your hands on your own grilled cheese!"
might be the first chapter in any book
5. ON COARSE LANGUAGE
Coarse slang is beside the mark but a good
grilled cheese sandwich cannot help but elicit
an enthusiastic "Right O!"
6. ON EXPRESSION
There should be a quality of protectiveness
in a man's expression when it falls on his grilled cheese
sandwich. As though so lovely a breath might break it.
7. ON DECENCY
The phrases devised to close a letter to a betrothed
are limited only by imagination
but do not belong in this or any other grilled cheese sandwich.
8. A NOTE TO THE GENTLEMAN
It would be presumptuous to tell any man how to prepare
his own grilled cheese sandwich when the answer is written
in his heart, his intellect, and his ardent civic pride.
[Christine Scanlon, 'The Grilled Cheese Sandwich', from The Best American Poetry 2005]