it seems to me that my whole life was nothing but a string of those small near misses

1 What have you done that others said you couldn't do? 

    • took the bar exam, passing on the first try. 

    • living by myself, without someone else to rely on every day.

    • moved a great deal of furniture without help, including down a flight of stairs.

 

2 What makes someone a genius? 

    aptitude plus application. Not just knowing things but using what they know for a greater purpose. By "greater purpose" I do not mean "for the good of all"—just that it's not only the knowledge that they have but the ability to see an aim for it.

3 What loud noises startle you most? 

    the house settling. My place gets direct sun for about 8 hours per day in the winter and closer to 12 hours per day in the summer. The temperature of the walls, windows, and especially doors can change dramatically, as a result. The front door makes a ferocious Pop that I can feel as far away as the master bedroom, and hear throughout. It startles me every single time.

4 If animals could talk, which ones would do the most complaining? 

    dogs that are forced to wear clothing for non-functional (i.e. weather or injury) purposes. They just look so embarrassed, like they're inwardly cringing. 

    Every person I know who's got a dog argues that this is not the case, that the little fellas run toward their raincoats or sweaters when they get the chance. I guess I just perceive it differently.

 

5 What was the last thing that gave you a static shock? 

    a cat. It's a rough season to have fur. Humidifiers can only do so much, and it sucks to get a hard zap when you think you're just getting a good petting.

    The worst, though, was from a peanut butter sandwich. I wouldn't have expected that to be so conductive, but it hurt like a bear and the spark was visible from 5 yards away.

 

6 What one day in your life would you like to relive? 

    a few years ago, during COVID mandated lockdowns, I was in regular face-to-face contact with only one person. They sometimes used my home as a base from which to run. While preparing to do so, spur of the moment, they shared that they were going to be traveling soon, and proposed that I come along. It was not precisely an "asked me to join" scenario, but more like "throwing it out there for us both to shoot holes in." When we'd debated it sufficiently, we mutually decided to go for it. We were both so excited that day (and, uncharacteristically, increasingly so as the trip grew nearer), the verbal equivalent of holding hands and leaping into the unknown. It was romantic, fun, and a little scary. I would love to feel that again.

 

7 Have you ever been caught telling a lie? 

    at the financial institution, I "over-promised and under-delivered" something to the scariest attorney I've ever met. I needed to get a very large (printed) document to them, like, yesterday. In a panic because they are intimidating as Hell anyway and specifically because it was late and getting later all the time, I let them believe that it was on its way. Well, that hit me in the face when they happened to be in our office and saw it on a desk. They didn't even have to say anything; the look alone would have frozen a volcano. 

    Lesson learned. And, for what it's worth, we later talked about it—I brought it up—and they were incredibly gracious, understanding what had happened and why, how new I was to that particular scenario and its timelines, and acknowledging with respect how hard it must have been for me to own up to it (both at the time and when we discussed it later). We left that issue, and our professional relationship, on good terms.

 

8 Would you have your dominant thumb surgically removed if it meant you'd be immune to all known diseases? 

    yes, no question. My thumbs are not great anyway (chronic tendinitis) and I've learned some ways to adapt already. It would be annoying, but far less so than dealing with "all known diseases." Sign me up!

 

9 You're given $1,000,000 to invest. Where and how do you invest it? 

    I'd get it to my guy Buzz, who's in charge of my other investments. I would love to do that, if only because I've always been the "courtesy account" tagging along with my parents' investments. It would be nice to make my money worth his time for once. 

    (Courtesy accounts are not unique to me or to Buzz' business; anywhere there's a fee-producing "main account," investors are permitted or even encouraged to "bring along" other, smaller accounts. It's good for long-term business and customer relations, it's nice to cite when defending against only being in it for the big investors and profits, and it's a practical reality. Until an investment has a chance to grow, it will necessarily be a little guy!)

 

10 What's the best purchase you've made on eBay? 

    postage stamps. Does that seem strange? I've found that people will buy up Forever stamps at the current price, betting on cost increases in the future. That way, even if they sell them at a discount as compared to the current price, they are still building in a profit.      

    However, the best deals I've gotten have been on denominated stamps (those with a fixed value). Because those are rarely offered now, and essentially gone the way of cursive writing and analog timepieces, people tend to overlook them as an option. I wanted a specific type of stamp, one that was no longer sold by USPS, because the image depicted had special meaning for me and the person to whom I was mailing. They were available on eBay for slightly over half of their face value.

    I bought their entire stock.

 

11 If you could talk to one animal, what one would it be and why?  

    furry soulmate, to find out if they feel the same about me

 

12 If you could choose your seat on a long-haul jumbo jet flight, where would you sit, and why? 

    first class, window. I've only been upgraded to first class once, and it was a gloriously comfortable, likely never repeated, luxury. (I wrote about it here, but only briefly.) It was with H, traveling to one of his psych conferences. I think it might have been the first trip to Miami, or maybe Santa Fe? My recollected impressions are of space, quiet, more and better food, a warm cloth, and a quick exit. I was on the aisle, but needs must.

 
13 Have you ever pretended not to be in when someone came to your door? 

    yes, that has happened dozens of times. I live alone, and strangers at the door are not always friendly/well-meaning/decent. Sometimes they really do mean to cause harm, whether physically or financially. I'm not talking about kids selling stuff for school, or nametag-wearing LDS elders doing their mission work. Politicians, scammers trying to sell roofing or carpet cleaning, a scruffy asking for a glass of water or to borrow the phone—they are all out of luck with me. I won't even pretend not to be home, just won't answer.

 

14 If a stranger said they'd pay you $100 for a selfie with you, would you do it? 

    maybe. It depends on the stranger, the location, the circumstances, whether I'm alone or in company, and so on. If I were in the right mood, the person was not at all creepy or physically imposing, if they were polite and had a reason for the offer, if we were in a safe area where I could escape if I felt compelled, and if they handed over the cash before the picture, heck yeah. I'm in a position where $100 would make a big difference.

 

15 What's the harshest truth you've ever been told? 

    "if I could love anybody, it would be you"—the implication being, he didn't actually love me (or anybody), and I was in that nameless but horrible relationship purgatory where it's clear each person wants a different result. He was a good guy and I have nothing but good memories of him, except that one heartbreaking statement.  

 

[from 3000 Unique Questions about Me; the title quotation is by Jean-Dominique Bauby, from The Diving Bell and the Butterfly: A Memoir of Life in Death]